John V.

One morning, an old lady goes to the grocery store to buy cat food for her little cat. She looks around and picks the most expensive kind of cat food. As she approaches the cashier, she tells her, "Nothing but the best for my little kitty." The clerk tells the old lady that she can't sell her the cat food because a lot of old people buy cat food to eat it. She then tells the old lady that she needs proof that she has a cat. So the old lady goes home, takes her cat, and drags it to the store. Once the clerk sees that the old lady actually has a cat, she sells her the cat food. The next day, the old lady goes to the grocery store again this time to buy dog food. She looks around and picks the most expensive kind of dog food. As she approaches the cashier, she tells her, "Nothing but the best for my little puppy." The clerk tells the old lady that she can't sell her the dog food because a lot of old people buy dog food to eat it. She then tells the old lady that she needs proof that she has a dog. So the old lady, who is now very frustrated, goes home, takes her dog, and drags it to the store. Once the clerk sees that the old lady actually has a dog, she sells her the dog food. The next day the old lady goes back to the grocery store with a jar in her hands. The jar is covered with old newspapers and it has a little hole at the top. The old lady goes directly to the clerk and politely asks the clerk to stick her finger in. The clerk immediately refuses because she is afraid that the old lady has a snake inside. The old lady assures the clerk that there is nothing in the jar that will bite her. So the clerk sticks her finger inside the jar and feels around. She tells the old lady that whatever is inside, is very soft and mushy. The old lady now tells the clerk to take her finger out, and smell it. The clerk does what she is told. As soon as she begins to smell her finger, she starts to yell. She told the old lady that the jar is full of crap and her finger smells like shit. The old lady, with a smile from one ear to the other, tells the clerk, "Very well. Now Do you think I can buy three rolls of toilet paper?"

funniness: 8.00

rating: PG