The Guy's rules

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The Guys' Rules ­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­ At last a guy has taken the time to write this all down Finally , the guys' side of the story. (I must admit, it's pretty good.) We always hear "the rules " From the female side.Now h ere are the rules from the male side. These are our rules! Please note.. these are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE! 1. Men ARE not mind readers.

1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down. We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.

1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides. Let it be.

1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it that way.

1. Crying is blackmail.

1. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one: Subtle hints do not work! Strong hints do not work! Obvious hints do not work! Just say it!

1. Yes and No are perfectly Acceptable answers to almost every question.

1. Come to us with a problem only If you want help solving it. That's what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.

1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem See a doctor.

1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.

1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't Expect us to act like soap opera guys.

1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.

1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one .

1. You can either ask us to do something Or tell us how you want it done. Not both. If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.

1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during commercials.

1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.

1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings. Peach, for example, is a fruit, not! A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.

1. If it itches, it will Be scratched. We do that.

1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like nothing's wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.

1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer you don't want to hear.

1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear Is fine... Really.

1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or golf.

1. You have enough clothes.

1. You have too many shoes.

1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!

1. Thank you for reading this. Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;

But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.

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submitted: 1+ years ago

viewed: 28,869 times

categories: men, women, relationships

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showing 1 - 17 of 17 discussions       sort by: newest

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by Dalton E. 1+ years ago

Copied.

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by emma l. 1+ years ago

That's not even funny!

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by NaTiVe B. 1+ years ago

did u make the lists alone if u did dats impressive

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by NaTiVe B. 1+ years ago

koo dats funy lyke the 1 dat says u have 2 many shoes, u have enough clothes its lyke campin, a headache thas lasts 17 months long u need 2 c a doc lmao

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by Larissa S. 1+ years ago

i love the same joke that has the female response with it

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by Katelyn K. 1+ years ago

so cute i liked the toilet one i never thought about what men think when we leave the seat up.

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by cathy c. 1+ years ago
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by cathy c. 1+ years ago
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by Brittany H. 1+ years ago

Obviously, you are too apathetic or afraid to say something, instead you wait for another guy to write it down and expect every girl to go find it ONLINE on a joke site. FOR 1: We don't read minds either! 2: If you talk we will listen, unless you are with a stupid slut that will take quarters for sex. 3: You are to much of a dickhead to understand anything, so stop acting like you know what you are talking about and shut the fuck up. and lastly 4: If you dont know, The Toilet comes with the seat down! thats the Natural order, you are the ones that need it up and put it up, so you put it up, and because its your neediness, then you put it the fuck down. Get the fuck over yourselves.

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by cathy c. 1+ years ago

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by a. l. 1+ years ago

DONT CLICK THIS LINK! http://www.brickfish.com/Pages/PhotosAlbums/PhotoView.aspx?qsi=26090183

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by rachel s. 1+ years ago

Really stupid and boring, I read half, and then facebook got more interesting. I eventually finished, but I was very disappointed. You fail.

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by King Funny 1+ years ago

what a fucking rip of from the one i have posted...

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by Paige B. 1+ years ago

okay, you said they're all numbered one for a reason, but you never said what the reason was. what's the point of all of them being 1?

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by meghan s. 1+ years ago

I just submitted a 'in response' plz read

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by Arron Cullen 1+ years ago

Good list!

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by chad b. 1+ years ago

so true

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CLT8X_The Guy's rules

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