So youre glad youre a chick? Well, Im glad Im a guy. So have a seat, missy, and Ill tell ya why Im so glad Im a man, I could stand and applaud That I dont have to live life as a broad. We do the same work, but Im better paid. Theres honor and not shame for me when I get laid. I can get head in a restaurant booth. Mechanics will (usually) tell me the truth. I can go sit at a bar all alone Without twenty drunk losers inviting me home. Workmen and service men never do hassle me. Car CD players dont simply baffle me. I can reach stuff hidden on the top shelf. I can change light bulbs all by myself. No one expects anything when I just flirt. I dont have to wear dumb stuff like hose or a skirt. My underwears cotton, and three for eight bucks. Bras are expensive and WIRE - that sucks. I get to buy cool stuff like hammers and drills. You have to buy makeup and birth control pills. Never will I suffer from PMS. It takes me ten minutes to shower and dress. Three pair of shoes are more than enough. I dont have a purse full of useless old stuff. None of my co-workers can make me cry. When someone fails to call, I dont give a shit why. I never will need an electrician or plumber. I can date someone much younger and dumber. Im GLAD Im a guy, with two balls and a dick, So I dont have to live life as a chick. I revel in guy-hood with joy I cant squelch, And Ill celebrate every scratch, every belch. Im glad Im a man, of that I am proud. Im not at all bitchy, annoying and loud. I wont try to squeeze in jeans three sizes too small. My credit card is still good when I leave from the mall. I wont drink Diet Coke, or eat a rice cake. Theres no silicone here, my chest isnt fake. My face isnt lifted, my bra isnt stuffed, I do whats proper, I leave the toilet seat up. It doesnt take hours to fix up my hair, I dont see the need to use bathrooms in pairs. I wont throw a tirade and then blame PMS. Im a man and Im glad I can deal with my stress. I have intuition, I never get lost. I share household duties, I wont try to be the boss. Im a man and with that comes a high sense of class, I wont wear a swimsuit that rides up my ass. I wont cry like a baby when Bambi gets shot I dont make up false places, like the infamous G-spot. I wont go out at night in a black mini-skirt, then slap anybody that just tries to flirt. You crazy women scare me, you have lots of gall, To make Lorena a hero for hacking off balls. Yes, Im pleased to be male and I dont mean to gloat. Im sorry you dont understand how to work the remote. Ill never tease you, or play hard to get. If I dont get my way, I wont throw a fit. I dont worry much about breaking a nail, My face without makeup isnt distorted and pale. Ill never say one thing while meaning another. When life gets real hard, I wont run to my mother. In order to understand just who I am; You need a Y-chromosome; its what makes you a man.
submitted: 1+ years ago
viewed: 2,154 times
categories: men, women, relationships
Please no offence to women just a joke so take it in the right spirit and enjoy!!!!