Fred was a religious man in a hospital on life support. So one day he calls in a priest so he can confess his sins and be blessed for the afterlife. When the priest gets there, Fred couldn't speak. So the priest gives Fred a pad and pencil. Fred frantically writes a note and dies. The priest never looks at the note and puts it in his pocket.
Next week at Fred's funeral, the priest made a speech. "...Fred was a fine man. The day he died, I was there and he wrote this note to me: Asshole you're standing on my oxygen tube"
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