One day, one of my step-father's friends was working on a ship, as a doctor. The captain's wife needed to go to the infirmary. She had been having sharp pains in her side.
Now, let me say right here, the captain's wife is a huge woman, with rolls everywhere.
Anyway, she went to the doctor. "Doctor, I've been having a sharp pain in my side!" "Well, lay down, and let's see what is going on."
She layed down, and the doctor started to prod her gently, asking if that was near where she has been hurting. He poked her gently near a certain part of her stomache, and she winced.
"Well, let's see what this is. Please raise your shirt, and wait while I get a nurse." She did as he said, and soon, he was back with a nurse. "Nurse, please hold this up, while I search for the cause of the pain." She preceded to hold it up, but she couldn't hold it up well because of it's weight. They ended up getting another nurse to help.
Together, they could lift the roll just barely enough for the doctor to start looking. When they lifted it up, the most rotten, horrible odor leaked out. It was so bad, one of the nurses had turned her head, and threw up a little.. The doctor lifted a perfumed doctor's mask over his nose, wincing.
He reached into the roll, and found a sandwich. He stopped short, and looked at the captain's wife. "There is a moldy sandwich here.. It seems to have eaten into your skin."
"So THAT'S where my sandwich went yesterday! I leaned over for the remote, and my sandwich just disappeared! Can I have it back now?"
Author note; Er.. Also kinda disgusting, instead of funny. Ew. Also, for those wondering.. The sandwich molded so fast because of the sweat and lack of good oxygen in the fold. Ewww.. XD