What Men Mean

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1. You’re the kind of girl a guy could really fall for. (I got no plans this weekend, so let’s go crazy and then you have to go.)

2. I just got this big assignment and I’m completely stuck. I can’t do anything until I’ve finished work. (I’m seeing someone else tonight, but what’re you doing Wednesday?)

3. Good morning, beautiful. (Oh, you’re still here)

4. I love my nephew. He’s changed my life in so many ways. I’m a better man because of him. (Have sex with me.)

5. It’s not you, it’s me. I’m just immature and you deserve better. And you’ll find him, too. The perfect guy for you. (Don’t cry, just don’t cry, please don’t cry, aw hell, you’re crying.)

6. This is a rare bottle of vintage French wine that I’ve been saving for a very special lady. (I’m not getting anywhere with you sober.)

7. Hey, the game is on. I got a hundred bucks on this game. (Hey, the game is on. I got a hundred bucks on this game.)

8. I don’t mean to rush you, but I have to go visit my mom. She’s in the hospital, poor thing. (Hurry up. Get out already.)

9. Sometimes when I look out on the ocean, I lose myself. My soul becomes one with the waves, with the stars, with the whole universe. I can see in your eyes that you know exactly what I’m talking about. (It doesn’t even matter what I say, does it? You’re going to do me anyway.)

10. Wow. You must be the most amazing lover in the whole world. (You hungry? I’m hungry. Where do you want go eat?)

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smiley 4.9 PG13

submitted: 1+ years ago

viewed: 2,558 times

categories: word fun (puns, riddles)

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