Top Things To Ponder -- 2007

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#10 Life is sexually transmitted.

#9 Good health is merely the slowest rate at which one can die.

#8 Men have two emotions: hungry and horny. If you see him without an erection, make him a sandwich.

#7 Give a person a fish and you feed them for a day. Teach a person to use the internet and they won't bother you for weeks.

#6 Some people are like a slinky... not really good for anything, but you still can't help but smile when you shove them down the stairs.

#5 Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in the hospital dying of nothing.

#4 All of us could take a lesson from the weather. It pays no attention to criticism.

#3 Why does a slight tax increase cost you two hundred dollars, and a substantial tax cut saves you thirty cents???

#2 In the 60's, people took LSD to make the world weird. Now the world is weird and people take Prozac to make it normal.

AND THE NUMBER ONE THOUGHT FOR 2007: We know exactly where one cow with mad-cow-disease is located among the millions and millions of cows in America , but we haven't a clue as to where thousands of illegal immigrants and terrorists are located. Maybe we should put the Department of Agriculture in charge of immigration.


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submitted: 1+ years ago

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categories: word fun (puns, riddles)





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showing 1 - 2 of 2 discussions       sort by: newest

+3 thumb down thumb up
by J N. 1+ years ago

The first one sounds better as 'Life is a sexually transmitted, terminal disease.'

Reply to J N.'s comment
+6 thumb down thumb up
by R.D. M. 1+ years ago

You're right about the last one!

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CE62G_Top Things To Ponder -- 2007

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