A little bird was flying south for the winter and it was really cold. He was trying very hard to make it, but the poor little bastard froze up and fell to the ground in a large field.
well the bird thought he was dead for sure, but then this cow comes along and shits on him. the little bird was so happy because the pile of shit was starting to thaw him out. He was so happy, taht he started to sing.
A passing cat heard the birds cries of happiness,dug him out of the shit and promptly ate him.
the moral of this story: not everyone who shits on you is your enemy, not everyone who gets you out of shit is your friend, and when your in deep shit,keep your mouth shut!!:)