A really hot beautiful blonde was about to jump off a bridge to kill herself. As she got ready to jump, Santa Clause came walking down and he said, "Now hold up a minute missy. Step down from there. I am the real Santa Clause." Surprised, she stepped down and said, "What?" Santa said, "This may sound weird, but I am the real Santa Clause. I am allowed to make one surprise visit per Christmas, and you looked like you needed a little help. What's wrong?"
"I have been working at my job for 3 great years and I got fired today. I thought to myself, whatever doesn't kill me can make me stronger. So I went home to my great husband of 5 years only to find him fucking my best friend! So I said to myself, 'I lost my job, my boyfriend and my best friend, I have nothing else to live for!'"
Santa said, "Alright, I can clean up this mess if you could do one thing for me." "Anything," the blonde said. "How about a blow job."
After about 20 minutes of bliss for Santa he said, "Thank you. When you go home, you will have your husband, best friend, and job back." She said, "Great!"
Santa said, "One more thing, how old are you?" She replied, "24. Why?"
Santa walked off and said, "24 and still believes in Santa Clause!"