1. Cucumbers can stay up all night, and you wont have to sleep in the wet spot.
2. Cucumbers don't play the guitar and try to find themselves.
3. A cucumber wont care what time of the month it is.
4. A cucumber never wants to get it on when your nails are wet.
5. Cucumbers don't say "Let's keep trying till we have a boy."
6. Cucumbers won't tell you size doesn't count.
7. A cucumber won't leave you for a cheerleader or an ex-nun.
8. Cucumbers don't drool on your pillow.
9. And finally.....With a cucumber, the toilet seat is always the way you left it.