One day in New Orleans, back in the '80s, Tom Arnold was walking down the street. Tom sat down and a few minutes later, he saw a funeral procession heading his way. First came a hearse, then a man crying his eyes out, next is a German Shepherd, and last is a single file line of men.
Tom was curious so he walked up to the man who's crying and asked, "Who died?" The man replied, "My wife." Tom asked, "Oh, how sad. How did she die?" "My...my dog ate...ate her alive." Tom thought for a minute, decided the dog was big enough and looked like he can hold a big meal so he asked, "Can I borrow your dog?" The man replied, "Get in line!"