New Sayings for a New America...

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New sayings that should be on buttons...

1. Well, this day was a total waste of make-up.

2. Make yourself at home! Clean my kitchen.

3. Who are these kids and why are they calling me Mom?

4. How do I set a laser printer to stun?

5. I majored in Liberal Arts. Will that be for here or to go?

6. This isn't an office-It's Hell with fluorescent lighting.

7. I started out with nothing & still have most of it left.

8. If I throw a stick, will you leave?

9. You! Off my planet!

10. Therapy is expensive, poppin' bubble wrap is cheap! You choose.

11. I like cats, too. Let's exchange recipes.

12. Friendly checkout clerk. Thanks for keeping me that way!

13. If I want to hear the pitter patter of little feet, I'll put shoes on my cat.

14. Does your train of thought have a caboose?

15. See no evil, hear no evil, date no evil.

16. Allow me to introduce my selves.

17. Sarcasm is just one more service we offer.

18. Better living through denial.

19. Suburbia: where they tear out the trees & then name streets after them.

20. I'm just working here till a good fast-food job opens up.

21. A cubicle is just a padded cell without a door.

22. Stress is when you wake up screaming & you realize you haven't fallen asleep yet.

23. One of us is thinking about sex..... OK, it's me.

24. I just want revenge. Is that so wrong?

25. I work 40 hours a week to be this poor.

26. You say I'm a bitch like it's a bad thing.

27. Nice perfume. Must you marinate in it?

28. Not all men are annoying. Some are dead.

29. Too many freaks, not enough circuses.

30. Chaos, panic, & disorder - my work here is done.

31. Ambivalent? Well, yes and no.

32. Earth is full. Go home.

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