President Clinton died and knocked at the Pearly Gates. "Who goes there?" inquired St. Peter. "It's me, Bill Clinton." "What sins did you commit while on Earth?" asked St. Peter. Clinton thought for a moment and then answered, "Well, I smoked marijuana, but you shouldn't hold that against me because I didn't inhale. And, I suppose I had extra-marital sex, but you shouldn't hold that against me because I didn't really have 'sexual relations.' I should also mention that I lied, but you shouldn't hold that against me either because I didn't commit perjury."
After several moments of deliberation, St. Peter replied, "Okay, here's the deal. We'll send you someplace where it's very hot, but we won't call it 'Hell.' You'll be there for an indefinite period of time, but we won't call it 'eternity.' And, don't 'abandon all hope' when you get there. Just don't hold your breath waiting for 'Hell' to freeze over."
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