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Funny Jokes

 


Funny Time

  1. The Envy of Long Necks.
  2. The Intellectual Wager: Professor vs. Farmer.
  3. The Bus Fart and Ticket Trick.
  4. The Toll of Mark's Bridge.
  5. The Great Cinnamon Roll Showdown.
  6. The Mysterious Disappearance of Trouble in Roberville.
  7. The Whimsical Road Trip Surprise.
  8. An 'S' Car Adventure.
  9. A Short and Sweet Memory.
  10. A Circus Audition.


1. The Envy of Long Necks

Giraffe and rabbit


The giraffe said, "Bunny, how nice it is to have a long neck, I wish you knew that with a long neck, whatever is good to eat will slowly pass through the long neck and that delicacy can be enjoyed for a long time."

The rabbit looked at him without expression.

The giraffe went on:-"And, in the summer, that cool water slowly flows through my long neck, and it is so' delicious. It's so nice to have a long neck! Rabbit, can you imagine?"

The rabbit said slowly, "Have you ever thrown up?"

2.  The Intellectual Wager: Professor vs. Farmer

Professor and farmer


A professor and a farmer make a bet.

The professor says, "If I ask a question and you don't know it, I'll give you five dollars.

You ask a question that I don't know, and I'll give you five hundred dollars, okay?

The farmer agrees.

Professor: How far is the moon from the earth?

The farmer hands the professor five dollars.

Farmer asks: What kind of animal has three legs up the mountain and four legs down the mountain?

The professor thinks hard and has no choice but to lose five hundred dollars.

The farmer took the money and the professor asked: What kind of animal is it?

The farmer handed the professor five dollars, said I do not know, and then went to sleep.

3. The Bus Fart and Ticket Trick

Bus story


The other day on the bus there were too many people, especially hot, especially stuffy.

I do not know who farted a fart, which is now the environment even worse.

My friend couldn't stand it and didn't know who it was, no way.

It happened that the conductor was asking: "Who didn't buy a ticket?"

My friend suddenly had a plan.

My friend suddenly had a plan, said loudly: " farting did not buy a ticket."

"Suddenly, a particularly fat woman, hand high in the air.

She said loudly: " I have already bought a ticket! I've already bought my ticket!"

4.  The Toll of Mark's Bridge

Mark's bridge


Two friends, John and Mark, were walking through the forest when they stumbled upon a magical frog. The frog looked at them and said, "Thank you for freeing me from this spell. I will grant each of you one wish."

John wished for a lifetime supply of chocolate. Poof! A mountain of chocolate appeared before him.

Mark thought for a moment and said, "I wish I had a bridge that could connect us to the neighboring village." Poof! A beautiful bridge appeared over a nearby river.

They both thanked the frog and went on their way. A few weeks later, they met again. John was enjoying his chocolate, but Mark seemed troubled.

John asked, "What's wrong, Mark? You got your bridge, didn't you?"

Mark sighed and replied, "Yes, I did, but the villagers named it 'Mark's Bridge,' and now they want me to pay tolls every time I cross it!"

5. The Great Cinnamon Roll Showdown

Cinnamon roll showdown


Once upon a time in a small town, there was a bakery owned by two brothers, Bill and Bob. They were known for their friendly rivalry and always tried to outdo each other with their pastries.

One day, Bill came up with a brilliant idea. He decided to bake a giant cinnamon roll, so enormous that it would fill an entire table. He worked tirelessly, using all the dough he had, and created a cinnamon roll of epic proportions.

When Bob saw it, he was determined not to be outdone. He spent the whole night baking an even bigger cinnamon roll, so enormous it could barely fit through the bakery door.

The next morning, the townspeople gathered to see the giant cinnamon rolls. Bill unveiled his creation first, and the crowd was impressed. But just as they were admiring it, Bob wheeled out his colossal cinnamon roll.

The townspeople gasped in amazement. Bob's cinnamon roll was twice the size of Bill's, and the crowd cheered for Bob's victory.

As the brothers stood side by side, Bill turned to Bob and said, "Well, you win, Bob. But I have to ask, how did you manage to make it so big?"

Bob grinned and replied, "Easy, Bill. I just used your recipe and doubled it!"

6. The Mysterious Disappearance of Trouble in Roberville

Disappearance of trouble in Roberville

Once upon a time, there was a village called Roberville, where lived a couple who were both illiterate. They had three sons: the eldest was named Rascal, the second was named Cleaver, and the youngest was named Trouble. One day, the three brothers went out together to buy some things. Suddenly, Trouble disappeared, and his two brothers rushed to the local security booth to report the incident. The police asked, "What happened?" Rascal said, "I'm Rascal from Roberville, and today I brought Cleaver with me. It's not a big deal; we just came to find Trouble."

7. The Whimsical Road Trip Surprise

Road trip surprise


Three friends, an elephant, a mouse, and a giraffe, decided to go on a road trip. They piled into a tiny car and hit the highway.

After a while, the elephant said, "I'm getting cramped in here, let's roll down the windows for some fresh air." The mouse chimed in, "And I can't see anything from down here, let's open the sunroof."

So, they rolled down the windows and opened the sunroof. Just then, a tomato and a cucumber flew in through the sunroof and landed in the back seat.

The elephant looked at them and said, "Hey, how did you guys get here?"

The tomato replied, "We're just here for the ride. We wanted to ketchup!"

The cucumber added, "And we're kind of in a pickle!"

8. An 'S' Car Adventure

S Car Adventure


One day, a snail walked into a luxury car dealership. The snail looked around and said to the salesman, "I'd like to buy a sports car, but I want it to have an 'S' on it."

The salesman, a bit confused, replied, "I'm sorry, but we don't customize our cars that way."

Undeterred, the snail persisted, "I'll pay top dollar for it. I really need that 'S'!"

The salesman thought for a moment and said, "Alright, we can arrange that for you." So they customized a sports car with a big 'S' on it.

The snail was thrilled and drove off in his new car. A few days later, his friends asked, "Why did you want an 'S' on your sports car?"

The snail grinned and said, "So when people see me driving by, they'll say, 'Look at that S-car-go!"

9. A Short and Sweet Memory

Short and sweet memory


One day, a man walked into a barber shop for a haircut. The barber was a friendly fellow known for his chatty nature. As the man settled into the chair, the barber asked, "So, how would you like your haircut today?"

The man thought for a moment and said, "I'd like it just like my memory—short and sweet."

The barber chuckled and began cutting the man's hair. After a few minutes, the man asked, "By the way, do you remember if I've been here before?"

The barber paused, scratched his head, and said, "Hmm, I'm not quite sure. My memory is as short as your haircut!"

10. A Circus Audition

A Circus Audition


At the circus, a young man approached the ringmaster and said, "I want to be part of the circus. I can imitate any animal you want!"

Intrigued, the ringmaster said, "Okay, show us your talent."

The young man cleared his throat and began his act. He roared like a lion, trumpeted like an elephant, and chirped like a bird. The audience was amazed by his talent.

Impressed, the ringmaster asked, "Can you do any other animals?"

The young man nodded confidently and said, "Certainly!" He then proceeded to imitate a horse's neigh, a monkey's screech, and even a seal's bark.

The ringmaster grinned and said, "You're hired! With your talent, you'll be the best zoo we've ever had!"


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