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North Carolina: The mere possession of a lottery ticket is illegal in North Carolina and may result in a $2,000 fine. No one may be a professional fortune-teller, and if one wishes to pursue the practice as an amateur, it must be practiced in a school or church. It's against the law to sing off key. Elephants may not be used to plow cotton fields. While having sex, you must stay in the missionary position and have the shades pulled. If a man and a woman who aren't married go to a hotel/motel and register themselves as married then, according to state law, they are legally married. All couples staying overnight in a hotel must have a room with double beds that are at least two feet apart. It is illegal to have sex in a churchyard. Oral sex is considered a crime against nature. A marriage can be declared void if either of the two persons is physically impotent. Persons in possession of illegal substances must pay taxes on them. A three dollar tax must be paid on all white goods sold. Organizations may not hold their meetings while the members present are in costume. Bingo games may not last over 5 hours unless it is held at a fair. Serving alcohol at a bingo game is not allowed. North Dakota: It is illegal to lie down and fall asleep with your shoes on. Beer and pretzels can't be served at the same time in any bar or restaurant. It is legal to shoot an Indian on horseback, provided you are in a covered wagon. Ohio: In Ohio, if you ignore an orator on Decoration day to such an extent as to publicly play croquet or pitch horseshoes within one mile of the speaker's stand, you can be fined $25. Women are prohibited from wearing patent leather shoes in public. It is illegal to fish for whales on Sunday. It is illegal to get a fish drunk. The Ohio driver's education manual states that you must honk the horn whenever you pass another car. Participating or conducting a duel is prohibited. Breast feeding is not allowed in public. It is illegal for more than five women to live in a house. It is illegal to mistreat anything of great importance. No one may be arrested on Sunday or on the Fourth of July. Oklahoma: One may not promote a "horse tripping event". It is illegal for the owner of a bar to allow anyone inside to pretend to have sex with a buffalo. Females are forbidden from doing their own hair without being licensed by the state. Dogs must have a permit signed by the mayor in order to congregate in groups of three or more on private property. Oklahoma will not tolerate anyone taking a bite out of another's hamburger. It is against the law to read a comic book while operating a motor vehicle. Whaling is illegal. It is illegal to have the hind legs of farm animals in your boots. Residents are taxed for the furniture in their homes, and any other personal belongings. People who make "ugly faces" at dogs may be fined and/or jailed. Cars must be tethered outside of public buildings. Oral sex is a misdemeanor and is punisable by one year in jail and a $2,500 fine. Anyone arrested for soliciting a hooker must have their name and picture shown on television. It's statutory rape for a man over 18 to have sex with a female under the age of 18, provided she's a virgin. Tattoos are banned. No one may spit on a sidewalk. It is illegal to wear your boots to bed. It is illegal to have sex before you are married. Fish may not be contained in fishbowls while on a public bus. Tissues are not to be found in the back of one's car. Oregon: Drivers must yield to pedestrians who are standing on the sidewalk. One may not test their physical endurance while driving a car on a highway. It is illegal to place a container filled with human fecal matter on the side of any highway. Babies may not be carried on the running boards of a car. Drivers may not pump their own gas. A door on a car may not be left open longer than is necessary. An adult may not show a minor any piece of classical artwork which depicts sexual excitement. Dishes must drip dry. The "Peer Review Statute" prohibits you from finding out details of any written or oral discussion about your medical treatment. It is illegal to whisper "dirty" things in your lover's ear during sex. Ice cream may not be eaten on Sundays. It is illegal to buy or sell marijuana, but it is legal to smoke it on your own property. One may not bathe without wearing "suitable clothing." Canned corn is not to be used as bait for fishing. Pennsylvania: It is contrary to Pennsylvania law to discharge a gun, cannon, revolver or other explosive weapon at a wedding. It is illegal to have over 16 women live in a house together because that constitutes a brothel. It it illegal to sleep on top of a refrigerator outdoors. Any motorist driving along a country road at night must stop every mile and send up a rocket signal, wait 10 minutes for the road to be cleared of livestock, and continue. A special cleaning ordinance bans housewives from hiding dirt and dust under a rug in a dwelling.You may not sing in the bathtub. Fireworks stores may not sell fireworks to Pennsylvania residents. A person is not eligible to become Governor if he/she has participated in a duel. Any motorist who sights a team of horses coming toward him must pull well off the road, cover his car with a blanket or canvas that blends with the countryside, and let the horses pass. Ministers are forbidden from performing marriages when either the bride or groom is drunk. No more than two packages of beer at a time may be purchased, unless you are buying from an official "beer distributor." All liquor stores must be run by the state. Motorized vehicles are not to be sold on Sundays. You may not catch a fish with your hands. You may not catch a fish by any body part except the mouth. Dynamite is not to be used to catch fish. Though you do not need a fishing license to fish on your own land, but a hunting license is required to hunt on your own land. Rhode Island: Cap guns are illegal. Ropes may not be strung across a highway. No one may bite off another's leg. Rhode Island recently applied to the US Government to make all the coastal waters of Rhode Island a "No Discharge Zone". Impersonating a town sealer, auctioneer, corder of wood, or a fence-viewer is against the law. Riding a horse over any public highway for the purpose of racing, or testing the speed of the horse is illegal. Exercising any labor, business, or work, or using any game, sport, play, or recreation, or causing any of the above to be done to or by your children, servants, or apprentices on the first day of the week (Sunday) results in a penalty of $5 for the first offense and $10 for the second. Professional sports, except ice polo and hockey, must obtain a license to play games on Sunday. Any marriage where either of the parties is an idiot or lunatic is null and void. It is considered an offense to throw pickle juice on a trolley. One must make a loud noise before passing a car on the left. South Carolina: It is illegal to display a confederate flag on a courthouse. By law, if a man promises to marry an unmarried woman, the marriage must take place. Railroad companies may be held liable in some instances for scaring horses. A railroad my not remove itself from a town of more than five hundred people. Fortune tellers are required to obtain a special permit from the state. Dance halls may not operate on Sundays. An exception to the above law is that light bulbs may be sold. No work may be done on Sunday. Musical instruments may not be sold on Sunday. Performing a U-turn within 1,000 feet of an intersection is illegal. It is considered an offense to get a tattoo. Horses may not be kept in bathtubs. It is illegal to sell any alcoholic beverages on Sunday, unless you own a private club. A permit must be obtained to fire a missle. It is illegal to give or receive oral sex in South Carolina. When approaching a four way or blind intersection in a non-horse driven vehicle you must stop 100 ft from the intersection and discharge a firearm into the air to warn horse traffic. It is perfectly legal to beat your wife on the court house steps on Sundays. Every adult male must bring a rifle to church on Sunday in order to ward off Indian attacks. It is a capital offense to inadvertently kill someone while attempting suicide. A person must be eighteen years old to play a pinball machine. South Dakota: No horses are allowed into Fountain Inn unless they are wearing pants. It is illegal to lie down and fall asleep in a cheese factory. Movies that show police officers being struck, beaten, or treated in an offensive manner are forbidden. Tennessee: You can't shoot any game other than whales from a moving automobile. Hollow logs may not be sold. More than 8 women may not live in the same house because that would constitute a brothel. It is illegal to use a lasso to catch a fish. "Crimes against nature" are prohibited. Ministers are to be dedicated to God and therefore are not eligible to hold a seat in either House of the Legislature. Any person who participates in a duel may not hold any public office in the state. Giving and receiving oral sex is still prohibited by law. Stealing a horse is punishible by hanging. No Christian parent may require their children to pick up trash from the highway on Easter day. Driving is not to be done while asleep. It is legal to gather and consume roadkill. The definition of "dumb animal" includes every living creature. Interracial marriages are illegal. Tattooing a minor is a misdemeanor. It is illegal to dare a child to purchase a beer. It is illegal to place tacks on a highway. Skunks may not be carried into the state. Texas: One must acknowledge a supreme being before being able to hold public office. It is illegal to sell one's eye. A program has been created in the state that attempts to control the weather. When two trains meet each other at a railroad crossing, each shall come to a full stop, and neither shall proceed until the other has gone. It is illegal to take more than three sips of beer at a time while standing. Up to a felony charge can be levied for promoting the use of, or owning more than six dildos. It is illegal for one to shoot a buffalo from the second story of a hotel. It is illegal to milk another person's cow. A recently passed anticrime law requires criminals to give their victims 24 hours notice, either orally or in writing, and to explain the nature of the crime to be committed. Homosexual behavior is a misdemeanor offense. The entire Encyclopedia Britannica is banned. Utah: It is against the law to fish from horseback. It is illegal not to drink milk. It is illegal to detonate any nuclear weapon. Birds have the right of way on all highways. A husband is responsible for every criminal act committed by his wife while she is in his presence. It is a felony to persistently tread on the cracks between paving stones on the sidewalk of a state highway. It's legal for restaurants to serve wine with meals, but only if you ask for the wine list. It is considered an offense to hunt whales. No one may have sex in the back of an ambulance if it is responding to an emergency call. Alcohol may not be sold during an emergency. Individuals may not possess beer in containers larger than two liters unless they are a retailer. Boxing matches that allow biting are not allowed. It is illegal to cause a catastrophe. Vermont: Women must obtain written permission from their husbands to wear false teeth. It is illegal to deny the existence of God. Virginia: Not only is it illegal to have sex with the lights on, one may not have sex in any position other than missionary. There is a state law prohibiting "corrupt practices of bribery by any person other than candidates. You may not engage in business on Sundays, with the exception of almost every industry. If one is not married, it is illegal for him to have sexual relations. You may not have oral or anal sex. Driving while not wearing shoes is prohibited.Police radar detectors are illegal. Citizens must honk their horn while passing other cars. Children are not to go trick-or-treating on Halloween. It is illegal to tickle women. No animal may be hunted for on Sunday with the exception of raccoons, which may be hunted until 2:00 AM Washington:(State) It is illegal to attach a vending machine to a utility pole without prior consent from the utility company. No person may walk about in public if he or she has the common cold. Destroying a beer cask or bottle of another is illegal. It is illegal to entice girls away from the Maple Lane School for girls. X-rays may not be used to fit shoes. All lollipops are banned. A law to reduce crime states: "It is mandatory for a motorist with criminal intentions to stop at the city limits and telephone the chief of police as he is entering the town. It is illegal to paint polka dots on the American flag. People may not buy a mattress on Sunday. All motor vehicles must be preceded by a man carrying a red flag (daytime) or a red lantern (nighttime) fifty feet in front of said vehicle. It is illegal to pretend that one's parents are rich. You are not allowed to breastfeed in public. One may not spit on a bus. When two trains come to a crossing, neither shall go until the other has passed. You cannot buy meat of any kind on Sunday. West Virginia: No children may attend school with their breath smelling of wild onions. Unmarried couple who live together and "lewdly associate" with one another may face up to a year in prison. When a railroad passes within 1 mile of a community of 100 or more people in it, they must build a station and stop there regularly to pick up and drop off passengers. Any person who commits adultery shall be fined at least twenty dollars. It is legal for a male to have sex with an animal as long as it does not exceed 40 lbs. A tax of 1 cent is levied for every 16 and 9 ounces of coke sold in a store. A person may be placed in jail for up to six months for making fun of someone who does not accept a challege. It is illegal to snooze on a train.A person may not hold public office if he or she has ever participated in a duel. For each act of public swearing a person shall be fined one dollar. According to the state constitution, it is unlawful for anyone to own a red or a black flag. If you wear a hat inside a theater, you may be fined. Roadkill may be taken home for supper. Whistling underwater is prohibited. Wisconsin: Butter substitutes are not allowed to be served in state prisons. Whenever two trains meet at an intersection of said tracks, neither shall proceed until the other has. As people used to smuggle it in from Illinois, all yellow butter substitute is banned. Condoms were considered an obsene article and had to hidden behind the pharmacist's counter. At one time, margarine was illegal. State Law made it illegal to serve apple pie in public restaurants without cheese. The state definition of rape stated that it was a man having sex with a woman he knows not to be his wife. While all cheese making requires a license, Limburger cheese making requires a master cheese maker's license. It is illegal to kiss on a train. It is illegal to cut a woman's hair. Margarine may not be substituted for butter in restaurants unless it is requested by the customer. The government may not prohibit manual flushed urinals. One may not camp in a wagon on any public highway or risk a fine of up to ten dollars. It is a class A misdemeanor to wave a burning torch around in the air. It is illegal to throw rocks at a railroad car. Livestock have the right-of-way on public roads. Wyoming: All new buildings that cost over $100,000 to build must have %1 of funds spent on art work for the building. If one is drunk in a mine, he or she could land in jail for up to a year. Junk dealers may not make any business transactions with drunk persons. It is illegal to wear a hat that obstructs people's view in a public theater or place of amusement. Using a firearm to fish is strictly forbidden. Any person who fails to close a fence is subject to a fine of up to seven hundred and fifty dollars. It is illegal for women to stand within five feet of a bar while drinking. You may not take a picture of a rabbit from January to April without an official permit. Skiing under the influence of alcohol is prohibited. Up Next: International Dumb Laws!!

funniness: 5.74

rating: PG