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BOSTONIANS ALL YOU 'OL BOSTONIANS ~ you're gonna love this!!!! "Mary-mutha-ah-gawd, you gotta be wicked smaht!" But we bet you don't know some things. Like, what's a three decka? A packie? How about a rotary? Ever banged a U-ey? Worn dungarees or ordered a frappe? Even a Rhodes scholar would have a tough time deciphering the language Boston calls its own. "New Englanders have had a long and strong tradition eccentric ways of expressing themselves, especially in Boston," said Boston University Linguistics professor Michael Feldman. "It's very distinctive." Indeed ~ and we'd have a pissah time tryin' to stump ya, then make fun of ya behind ya back . .. but that's wicked mean. Instead, here's a little primer to take with you on the T, while you're on the Common or in the Gahden, maybe catchin' a Pats game or sipping a regulah coffee at Dunkies. American Chop Suey ~ Found in school cafeterias, this delightful dish doesn't resemble anything American or Chinese. ~~~~~~~It's macaroni with meat and tomato sauce. Bangin' a U-ey ~~~~ This is what you do while driving after you miss a turn and you have to turn around. Book it ~ To high tail someplace, as in, "I better book it to Stah Mahket before it closes." Bubblah ~ Spelled bubbler, it's a water fountain. Der ~ An interjection indicating disdain for someone else's stupidity, as in, "The old Gahden was way betta than the Fleet! Der!" Down Cellar ~ The basement. As in; "run down cella and get me a dishtowel outta the drya." Derived from upstairs. Dungarees ~ Jeans. Hardly heard anymore, unless you're at some sort of senior citizens event. Frappe ~ What the rest of the nation calls a milkshake. But in Boston, a milkshake is just flavored milk with ice cream & a lot of it...... Fried and Bizaah ~ Weird. "That dude is wicked fried." "Yah, he's totally bizaah." Fudge-icle ~ To the rest of the world, a frozen chocolate pop is a Fudgesicle, but in Boston, the 's' is silent. Hermits and black and whites ~ Cookies. A hermit is a molasses and raisin bar. Black and whites, known anywhere else as half moons or half and halfs, are round, cakelike cookies with chocolate frosting on one half, vanilla on the other. Jimmies ~ Sprinkles you put on ice cream. Packie ~ Liquor Store. You'll have to make a packie run if you want a kegga (keg party.) Pissah ~ Good Rotary ~ traffic circle. And in Massachusetts, those in the rotary have the right of way. Scrod ~ a generic name for white fish. We think it's cod, but no one's sure. Usually breaded and laden with butter. So Don't I / So Aren't I ~ So do I, So am I. "I have tickets to Aerosmith tonight." "Oh my Gawd, so don't I!" "No Suh!" "Yah huh." "Wicked Pissa!" Three Decker ~ Pronounced three decka, it's a three story house in which each story is a separate apartment. A time ~ A party. "We're going to a time for Sully at McGuire's." Tonic ~ Soda. Wicked ~ Extremely. "Nomaaah's a wicked good baseball playa." Yah huh and no suh ~ Yes and no. Usually heard during an intense conversation. "I saw Mickey at Castle Island and he was with another girl." "No SUH!" "Yah huh." Other tips: Don't say COPEly Square, it's COPley. Worcester isn't WOOster, it's Wisstah. Don't Say Commonwealth Avenue, Massachusetts Avenue or Dorchester Avenue. It's Comm. Ave, Mass. Ave and Dot. Ave.

funniness: 5.10

rating: PG