Jarry M.

You know you play too much starcraft when... ? You call your house your "Nexus." ? You play basketball and ask your friends if the game is melee or UMS. ? You are poor and you tell your dad to harvest more minerals. ? You realize that you're broke and ask your parents to borrow some minerals. ? You decide to blow yourself up as a suicide bomber and shout "here's for the Swarm!" ? You inject steroids into your arm on the way home to get there faster. ? You pretend that a box is an SCV and you sit in it and pick your nose. ? You send siblings out to scout neighbors' yards. ? Your solution for Iraq is "Battlecruisers. Mass Battlecruisers." ? Your only fear when massing Battlecruisers against Iraq is that they may have cloaked Wraiths waiting. ? You sit in a traffic jam and wonder if your car has a Siege mode. ? Laser pointers are now weapons of mass destruction - avoid them at all costs. ? The Bunsen burner in chemistry looks deliciously inviting as a splash damage weapon. ? You poke people repeatedly. Maybe they'll say something funny. ? You complain about the inefficiency of our military. Even on slow days, it only took you half an hour to amass a fleet and annihilate your opponent. ? You don't believe in the concept of overpopulation. Why not just build more supply depots? ? Missile turrets are a crucial part to any home security system. Bunkers too. Hell, a few Siege Tanks here and there wouldn't hurt. ? You call your school bully a Dragoon. ? You start calling rich people "n00bs" and tell them to play on real maps. ? You walk by a construction site and wonder why they just don't warp everything in. ? You think strategically placing Arbiters around your town/city so they can recall people wherever they want is a really good idea. ? You mistake your grandmother for an Infested Kerrigan. ? You mistake Democrats for UED leaders. ? You think babies come from Gateways. ? Your friend is a Hydralisk. No matter what anyone else says, he's a Hydralisk. ? You tell people to go somewhere and you start repeatedly "clicking" your finger. ? You try to Optical Flare your dog. ? You answer the phone with "You want a piece of me boy?!" ? You know everyone on Battle.net. Everyone on Battle.net knows you. ? You give people your Battle.net username instead of your phone number. ? You go by your Battle.net alias. ? You know, by heart, how many hits it will take a marine to destroy a Battlecrusier. ? You can beat every Terran campaign mission with 4 marines and an SCV. ? You went as a Zealot for Halloween. ? You use the wall in your room as a board for designing new strategies. ? You can draw any custom map someone tells you to draw. ? You have been to every single StarCraft site searching for the best possible strategy. ? You have a small shrine dedicated to your SC CD case. ? You change religions. You are now part of the Khalai. ? You name your son Fenix. ? You have a meeting every week with your friends so you can come up with new strategies. ? The doctor injects the flu shot into you, you sigh relaxingly and say "ah, that's the stuff." ? You force your mom to call the school bus a "Shuttle" ? You see your friend in a fight and you shout "We must join our bretheren in battle!" ? You worry about walking through narrow places because there might be burrowed lurkers. ? You're sleeping with your girl and accidently scream "Kerrigan" instead of her name. ? You cry yourself to sleep because your SC CD is missing. ? You actually understand all of the above jokes.

funniness: 4.71

rating: G