Michael H.

This man is convicted of crime and sentenced to do hard time in prison. The man has never been imprisoned before and is very scared. He is most terrified from the stories of how new inmates are raped and used sexually by other prisoners. As he is being led to his cell the first day, other inmates are whistling at him and yelling lewd comments. This only intensifies his worries and concerns about being raped. When he reaches his cell, he sees that his cellmate is a very large, ugly, mean-looking guy. The man is just sure that he'll be abused. When the guard leaves, the cellmate says nothing and appears uninterested in the man's arrival. He is is a little relieved. "Maybe I got lucky," thinks the man to himself. The end of the day approaches and still no conversation or contact from the big, ugly cellmate. The guards announce lights out, and the place goes almost black. The man is relieved when still nothing is said and starts to relax a little. Then all of a sudden in a deep, straight-forward voice, the cellmate says, "You want to be the man or the woman tonight?" The man's heart races and he is stricken with fear. This is the moment he's been dreading. He says, "Excuse me?" Again, the big, ugly cellmate says, "You gonna be the man or the woman tonight?" The man thinks to himself that he has no way to avoid this situation. The other guy is too big and there is no escape. He says, "I think I'd like to be the man," thinking that he can at least close his eyes and perform the sex act without pain this night. The cellmate says, "You want to be the man tonight?" The man replies, "Yes, please, if that's alright with you." The big ugly cellmate turns around, drops his pants, bends over spreading his ass cheeks wide. He looks around and say to the man in a deep demanding voice, "Alright, then get over here and start eating your ol' lady's pussy!"

funniness: 6.55

rating: R