M P.

If she cries, she's upset. If I cry, I'm a wuss If she talks dirty to me, she likes me. If I do it, I'm harassing her. If she gets a job first, it's being fair. If I get it it's favoritism. If she's broke and homeless, she's been abused. If I am, I'm a bum. If she goes somewhere with another woman, she has a friend. If I go somewhere with another man, I'm gay. If she kicks/punches me in the balls, it's payback. If I kick/punch her in the breasts, I'm a sexual harasser, and it's in newspapers everywhere.

funniness: 7.25

rating: PG