Alex A.

1. A right lane construction closure is just a game to see how many people can cut in line by passing you on the right as you sit in the left lane waiting for the same jerks to squeeze their way back in before hitting the orange construction barrels. 2. Turn signals are clues as to your next move. It's important that you never use them. 3. Under no circumstances should you leave a safe distance between you and the car in front of you or the space will be filled in by somebody else putting you in an even more dangerous situation. 4. Crossing two or more lanes in a single lane change is considered, "going with the flow." 5. The faster you drive through a red light, the smaller the chance you have of getting hit. 6. Braking is to be done as hard and late as possible to insure that your ABS kicks in giving a nice relaxing foot massage as the brake pedal pulsates. For those of you without ABS, it's a chance to stretch your legs. 7. Construction signs tell you about road closures immediately after you pass the last exit before the traffic begins to back up.

funniness: 5.36

rating: PG