Sign over a Gynecologist's Office: "Dr. Jones, at your cervix." **********

In a Podiatrist's office: "Time wounds all heels." **********

On a Septic Tank Truck: Yesterday's Meals on Wheels **********

Sign on the back of yet another Septic Tank Truck: "Caution - This Truck is full of Political Promises" **********

On a Plumber's truck: "We repair what your husband fixed." **********

On another Plumber's truck: "Don't sleep with a drip. Call your plumber." **********

On a Church's Bill board: "7 days without God makes one weak." **********

At a Tire Store: "Invite us to your next blowout." **********

On an Electrician's truck: "Let us remove your shorts." **********

In a Non-smoking Area: "If we see smoke, we will assume you are on fire & take appropriate action." **********

On a Maternity Room door: "Push. Push. Push." **********

At an Optometrist's Office: "If you don't see what you're looking for, you've come to the right place." **********

On a Taxidermist's window: "We really know our stuff." **********

On a Fence: "Salesmen welcome! Dog food is expensive!" **********

At a Car Dealership: "The best way to get back on your feet - miss a car payment." **********

Outside a Car Exhaust Store: "No appointment necessary. We hear you coming." **********

In a Vets waiting room: "Be back in 5 minutes. Sit! Stay!" **********

In a Restaurant window: "Don't stand there and be hungry; come on in & get fed up." **********

In the front yard of a Funeral Home: "Drive carefully. We'll wait." **********

And don't forget the sign at a RADIATOR SHOP: "Best place in town to take a leak." **********