military rules for the non military

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Dear Civilians,

We know that the current state of affairs in our great nation have many civilians up in arms and excited to join the military. For those of you who can't join, you can still lend a hand. Here are a few of the areas we would like your assistance with:

The next time you see an adult talking (or wearing a hat) during the playing of the National Anthem ... kick their ass.

When you witness firsthand someone burning the American Flag in protest... kick their ass.

Regardless of the rank they held while they served, pay the highest amount of respect to all veterans. If you see anyone doing otherwise, quietly pull them aside and explain how these Veterans fought for the very freedom they bask in every second. Enlighten them on the many sacrifices these Veterans made to make this Nation great. Then hold them down while a Disabled Veteran kicks their ass.

(GUYS) If you were never in the military, DO NOT pretend that you were. Wearing battle dress uniforms (BDU's), telling others that you used to be "Special Forces," and collecting GI Joe memorabilia, might have been okay if you were still seven. Now, it will only make you look stupid and get your ass kicked.

Next time you come across an Air Force member, do not ask them, "Do you fly a jet?" Not everyone in the Air Force is a pilot. Such ignorance deserves an ass kicking (children are exempt).

If you witness someone calling the U.S. Coast Guard non military, inform them of their mistake...and kick their ass.

Roseanne Barr's singing of the National Anthem is not a blooper...it was a disgrace and disrespectful. Laugh, and sooner or later your ass will be kicked.

Next time Old Glory (U.S. flag) prances by during a parade, get on your damn feet and pay homage to her by placing your hand over your heart. Quietly thank the military member or veteran lucky enough to be carrying her...of course, failure to do either of those could earn you a severe ass kicking.

What Jane Fonda did during the Vietnam War makes her the enemy. The proper word to describe her is "traitor." Just mention her nomination for "Woman of the Year" and get your ass kicked.

Don't try to discuss politics with a military member or a veteran. We are Americans and we all bleed the same regardless of our party affiliation. Our Chain of Command, is to include our commander in Chief. The President (for those who didn't know) is our CIC regardless of political party. We have no inside track on what happens inside those big important buildings where all those representatives" meet. All we know is that when those civilian representatives screw up the situation, they call upon the military to go straighten it out. The military member might direct you to Oliver North. (I can see him kicking your ass already.)

"Your mama wears combat boots" never made sense to me ... stop saying it! If she did, she would most likely be a vet and probably kick your ass!

Bin Laden and the Taliban are not communists, so stop saying "Let's go kill those Commie's!!!" And stop asking us where he is!!!! Crystal balls are not standard issue in the military. That reminds me ... if you see anyone calling those damn psychic phone numbers; let me know, so I can go kick their ass.

Flyboy (Air Force), Jar Head (Marines), Grunt (Army), Squid (Navy) etc, are terms of endearment we use describing each other. Unless you are a service member or vet, you have not earned the right to use them. Could get your ass kicked.

Last but not least, whether or not you become a member of the military, support our troops and their families. Every Thanksgiving and religious holiday that you enjoy with family and friends please remember that there are, literally, thousands of sailors and troops far from home wishing they could be with their families. Thank God for our military and the sacrifices they make every day. Without them, our country would get its ass kicked.

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smiley 7.1 PG

submitted: 1+ years ago

viewed: 11,505 times

categories: news, politics, government

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joke

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showing 1 - 22 of 22 discussions       sort by: newest

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by chad b. 1+ years ago

no, really its a joke, chill out. i don't make empty threats over the internet, we are never going to see each other over the interenet so why bother?

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[below viewing threshold, show comment] -1 thumb down thumb up
by emily e. 1+ years ago

Geo you sound like a champ :D Much Love and Respect

Reply to emily e.'s comment
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by chad b. 1+ years ago

ok, it seems people are misreading this post, it has nothing to do with being tough on the internet or that i'm gonna come kick your ass if you disagree, or that our military is right, but its more a vent for those that had to go fight those wars, this is for the troops, the people, not the governement, which yeah, fucks up alot, if your gonna call dumbass figure out who the post is for

Reply to chad b.'s comment
[below viewing threshold, show comment] -1 thumb down thumb up
by Snake F. 1+ years ago

ha, YOU'RE a tool. and this post is toolish. toolbag

Reply to Snake F.'s comment
[below viewing threshold, show comment] -1 thumb down thumb up
by Geo T. 1+ years ago

but if we make fun of mass murder on behalf of oil and chivalry THATS WHEN HE'LL GET PISSED! seriously, Jeff's right

Reply to Geo T.'s comment
[below viewing threshold, show comment] -1 thumb down thumb up
by Geo T. 1+ years ago

which is why you shoot down everyone who disagrees with you. good job, jackass.

Reply to Geo T.'s comment
[below viewing threshold, show comment] -1 thumb down thumb up
by Geo T. 1+ years ago

emily i'm totally on your side. gov't in general is the reason for every war and hatred. anarchy has proven useless because gung ho dumbasses (chad) have rendered it impossible, because somebody will start a war because of it. so peace has been lost because of the army, who say they're fighting for peace, when in reality, if they had peace, they'd have nothing to do because they've only trained to fight wars. and now i'm done.

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by Geo T. 1+ years ago

but, you're only tough on the internet. sounds like we have a hypocrite on our hands, chad

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[below viewing threshold, show comment] -2 thumb down thumb up
by david k. 1+ years ago

They fought for our freedom, and if we don't appreciate it then we get our ass kicked... That's called fascism. You're a fascist.

Show 2 replies to this comment

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by Jasmine S. 1+ years ago

Emily E is a jerk, I'm a good person and don't like to cuss, but fuck you!My stepbrother went into the army and got a disease, but he did it to protect us and to try to keep us safe, and i know he would do it again, you have no right to say what you did! UNLESS YOU WERE IN THE ARMY! And i do not think that this is a joke, but instead a wakeup call to the jerks like emily e, to be patriotic and get over themselves

Reply to Jasmine S.'s comment
[below viewing threshold, show comment] -2 thumb down thumb up
by emily e. 1+ years ago

The only reason that this would even be classified as a joke is because YOUR FUCKING MILITARY IS A JOKE! Fuck you and your stupid war. FUCK YOU for ruining a country. You say you should be respected for "serving your country" WELL IF THERE WERN"T ASSHOLES ALL OVER THE WORLD LIKE YOU(!!!) THE COUNTRY WOULDN"T NEED PROTECTING!!!! I will honor a vetran only if he was drafted. Those who sign up for it brought it upon themselves and deserve everything they got. Fuck, when is the world going to grow up and stop arguing over petty things. LEARN TO FUCKING SHARE!! I did when I was two. I , as a "civilion", kill a person and i go to jail for 25 years. Some fucking WANKER in a costume does it and he gets sent home with fucking medals, a pat on the back and the respect of every fucking idiot that is too dumb to realize that WHAT YOU ARE DOING IS WRONG!!!!

Show 3 replies to this comment

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by Megan C. 1+ years ago

If someone copies this joke... they'll get their ass kicked because this joke SUCKS!!!!!

Show 1 replies to this comment

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by kunal p. 1+ years ago

idiot. this kind of attitude is exactly what makes people see veterans as narrow-minded morons. this "joke" is achieving the opposite effect of what you desired.

Show 1 replies to this comment

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by max b. 1+ years ago

hahahahahahhaha

Reply to max b.'s comment
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by Geofforini 1+ years ago

Whether I not I agree with this, or respect the military is really irrelevant because the post isn't funny. Had to rate it a zero, sorry.

Show 1 replies to this comment

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by jack w. 1+ years ago

i got a video somewhere showing how good we have it and how bad it is there and how much they go through its actually kinda sad how much they go through for us and how many people never thank them for people who never thank them fuck you......our army is out there doing this for us to keep us safe all they get in return(if they are still alive) is to go home maybe get a medal or 2 and see there familes

Show 1 replies to this comment

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by Dusk S. 1+ years ago

Yeah wow "not sayin t.", i bet you're "sayin" that because you play Halo 3 24/7.

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[below viewing threshold, show comment] -3 thumb down thumb up
by Jeff W. 1+ years ago

you are a hatemonster if you are still trying to hate on Jane Fonda. She only went to visit. It took bravery on her part to do so. She did not agree to fight the war. Takeing a message would have been a crime she could have been arrested for. go be desperate, pitiful, and pathetic by yourself and keep those sentiments of misery and hate to youirself.

Show 1 replies to this comment

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by l l. 1+ years ago

Ugg. I'd speak freely, but thats not allowed, if it's not what someone wants to hear.

Show 1 replies to this comment

[below viewing threshold, show comment] -4 thumb down thumb up
by notsayin t. 1+ years ago

i would never join unless needed really bad but, if i dd, id go to the marines, there one of the only ones who can match my strength and speed

Show 3 replies to this comment

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by Saran W. 1+ years ago

I completely agree with you. Especially the last part. My dad was in the Air Force and never flew a single plane. He was a mechanic. I also have intentions on being in the military. I'm thinking about the National Guard.

Reply to Saran W.'s comment
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by Eric M. 1+ years ago

Salute

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CK3GE_military rules for the non military

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