You've been without sex for too long if

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Woman's version.

You become even more sure that all men are jerks. You keep on dreaming about prince on white horse, but already without horse.... and without clothes....

You stand for one hour in Museum near statue of Apollo, but you absolutely can't remember it's face.

You are permanently dreamily singing: «Boys Boys Boys...»

You are afraid to get drunk because you afraid that you will use your condition as excuse.

Unshaven guy in crumpled clothes is just "stylish" for you now.

An idea that "sex can't be so vitally important for educated and civilized woman" isn't so obvious already.

Critical days and all other days of month slowly change places.

Costs, which you saved on pregnancy tests, is enough now to buy a laundry washer.

You again have all fears of first sexual contact.

Man's version

You start to think that ugly women are not existing.

You can't understand what means "morning erection" and what's the difference from "day", "evening" and "night" erections.

Thoughts about foods become secondary.

You can watch TV translation of Woman's Chess Championship for hours.

You suffer from erotic dreams as badly as gynaecologist.

You are calm when you pass by dermatovenerologic hospital.

All "back thoughts" now moved to foreground.

When you kiss woman's hand, you make a blue spot there.

"Use-by date" of you last condoms is overdue for an year already.

Now you know for sure, what will be your last wish before the death penalty.


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submitted: 1+ years ago

viewed: 228 times

categories: men, women, relationships





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CIQ1K_You've been without sex for too long if

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