If a water spins clockwise when it drains in the northern hemisphere, and water spins counterclockwise when it drains in the southern hemisphere...which way does it spin at the equator?that directional spinning thing is a myth you can change the direcion with your hand
Have you ever thought what life would be like if your name was Anonymous? You'd get credit for everything nobody wanted credit for?no i havent thought about it i think that most people dont
If you had x-ray vision, but closed your eyes, could you still see?no one has xray vision retard
What do you say when someone says you're in denial, but you're not? you ignor them and get on with your life
Why do they call it 2% milk, if its 2% fat, not milk? because if they called it 2% fat no one would buy it because it sounds much more fattining
Do siamese twins pay for one ticket or two tickets when they go to movies and concerts? they pay for 2
Do birds pee?no their liquid excreatment is mixed in their crap thats why its a liquid
If you are born on February 29 of a leap year, when is your birthday? you would most likely have your birthday on febuary 28 or january 1
When a male is elected president and his wife is called the First Lady. What would a lady's husband be called if she were elected president? the fist man retard
Can dogs have dog days? PUNS ARE NOT FUNNY!!!
Why does blow and suck mean the same thing when we describe something being crap?THEY'RE JUST SAYINGS!
Why do they call the clock where you punch your time card called a "time" clock? Aren't all clocks "time" clocks?they're called time clockes because they punch time cards
Does anyone actually kill two birds with one stone?once again its a saying
Why did Superman wear his briefs on the outside of his tights?1 its a show/movie 2 who cares?!
Why do people say heads up when you should duck?its just a saying!!!!!
Why do radio operators say "niner" instead of just "nine"? they say it to avoid confusion in case of static
Do dumped farmers get John Deere letters? GOD YOU DAMN ANNOYING RETARD!!!!!!!
Do pigs pull ham strings? PUNS NOT FUNNY
On a telephone, why does ABC start on the number 2 and not 1? because the 1 button already has a function
Do sheep get static cling when they rub against one another? no because it dosent work if the fibres arnt woven
Isn't it scary that the word "therapist" is the same as the words "the" and "rapist" put together? its just a word
Why do people, such as S.W.A.T or Seals wear the bulletproof vests where you can see them? Wouldnt people aim for their head or crotch? they actually normally wear helmets ,bulletproof pants ect leaving only small parts of their bodys uncovered
How come, in the Mini Wheats commercials, Sweets has a Brooklyn accent and Wheats has an English accent? They're attached at the back, wouldn't they have been raised in the same place? its an ad their accents are to support a stereotype
Why do they put Canadian bacon on Hawaiian Pizza? because it tastes good
If our planet is inhabited with creatures made by God...is it possible that there's another planet inhabited with creatures made by the Devil? god and the devil have yet to be proven and there is also no proof of life on other planets though it is possible
If a table is propped up can it be propped down? puns not funny!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
If shampoo comes in so many colors, why is the lather on your head always white? because lather is made of bubbles and bubbles dont absorb light and so reflect all light and light with all colors is white though if the lather is thick enough it will have a colored tinge
Is an alcoholic just a drunk that's scared of a hangover? no its a person who has serious problems
Seeing as cupid is so good at matchmaking, does he have a girlfriend? no hes a mythological character
If the police see some one committing a crime but are on there way to investigate a crime do they stop or go to the one they were on their way to? they stop and call backup to deal with the original crime
What is the parking situation like at the Special Olympics? its usually has a few more handicapped spots but only the competitors are hadicapped the audience is pretty average with only a couple extra handicapped people
Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in binoculars to look at things on the ground? because they enjoy the view
Can't anybody who has a job go in the "employees only" doors at restaurants? Shouldnt they be more specific and say "employees of this place only"? no because most people get that without it needing to be written
Why are you IN a movie, but your ON TV? because "im on a movie" sounds weird and people do say "im in tv" when asked about their job as in "im in the tv industry
When you snap your fingers, does the sound occur when your middle finger releases from your thumb, or when your middle finger hits the palm of your hand?their are two sounds when you snap but the main louder one is the one when your finger hits your palm
If Sunday is the holy day of rest why do we have to get up early for church? because its the holy day and besides alot of churches have later sermons starting at 9 or 10 am
If you drink Pepsi at work in the Coke factory, will they fire you? no they dont want to be sued
If the weather man says "it's a 50% chance of rain" does that mean he has no idea if its going to rain or not? they no idea any way its a propability. they never say that its 100% chance of rain if the do the real probability is like 95%
submitted: 1+ years ago
viewed: 458 times
categories: word fun (puns, riddles)
God your an a**. Ok the first off, don't criticize people's intelligence if you can't spell ("the FIST man"??) And Canadian Bacon is actually ham and pigs are a very large problem in Hawaii THAT is why their is "Canadian Bacon" on Hawaiian Pizza. Get a sense of humor