pub jokes

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Q:A man walks into the pub and askes for water the bartender pulls out a gun. Later the man walks out the pub happy why is this.A:He had the hiccups.

A fish was into a pub and sees a donkey. He trys to make a smart coment by saying hey jackass. He turned arround and said this coming from someone who sleeps were they eat.

Three men go in a pub to get a drink but the bartender wont give it to them. They ask why hes being soo harch. Then they see on t.v. the story of jesus christ.

A bartender a resturant owner and a policeman are in the pub. They make a bet for ten o'clock that whoevers pee goes the highest wins $50 per person. They shake hands and agree. at 8:30 the police man goes to the toliet. At 9:30 the resturant owner goes to the toliet. When they get to the pub the policeman and the resturant owner cant go higher then 5cm. When its the bartenders turn he goes up 2 6inch. They ask him how he did it. He replied well i stuk a corkpick up my bum and it wouldnt let the stuff out.

A:santa a dumb blonde and a smart blond are on the roof of a bar. Who hits the floor first?A:the dumb blonde theres no such thing as santa and ive neva seen a smart blonde have you?


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