6 Smartass Answers

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Top 6 Smartass Answers

SMARTASS ANSWER #6 It was mealtime during a flight on Hooters Airline. "Would you like dinner?" the flight attendant asked John, seated in front. "What are my choices?" John asked. "Yes or no," she replied.

SMARTASS ANSWER #5 A flight attendant was stationed at the departure gate to check tickets. As a man approached, she extended her hand for the ticket and he opened his trench coat and flashed her. Without missing a beat, she said, "Sir, I need to see your ticket not your stub."

SMARTASS ANSWER #4 A lady was picking through the frozen turkeys at the grocery store but she couldn't find one big enough for her family. She asked a stock boy, "Do these turkeys get any bigger?" The stock boy replied, "No ma'am, they're dead."

SMARTASS ANSWER #3 The cop got out of his car and the kid who was stopped for speeding rolled down his window. "I've been waiting for you all day," the cop said. The kid replied, "Yeah, well I got here as fast as I could." When the cop finally stopped laughing, he sent the kid on his way without a ticket.

SMARTASS ANSWER #2 A truck driver was driving along on the freeway. A sign comes up that reads, " Low Bridge Ahead." Before he knows it, the bridge is right ahead of him and he gets stuck under the bridge. Cars are backed up for miles. Finally, a police car comes up. The cop gets out of his car and walks to the truck driver, puts his hands on his hips and says, "Got stuck, huh?" The truck driver says, "No, I was delivering this bridge and ran out of gas."

SMARTASS ANSWER OF THE YEAR 2006 A college teacher reminds her class of tomorrow's final exam. "Now class, I won't tolerate any excuses for you not being here tomorrow. I might consider a nuclear attack or a serious personal injury, illness, or a death in your immediate family, but that's it, no other excuses whatsoever!" A smart-ass guy in the back of the room raised his hand and asked, "What would you say if tomorrow I said I was suffering from complete and utter sexual exhaustion?" The entire class is reduced to laughter and snickering. When silence is restored, the teacher smiles knowingly at the student, shakes her head and sweetly says, "Well, I guess you'd have to write the exam with your other hand."

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submitted: 1+ years ago

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categories: holidays, vacations insults sex, sexuality

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showing 1 - 15 of 15 discussions       sort by: newest

0 thumb down thumb up
by Preston N. 1+ years ago

Moe is a god. I pray to him before I go to bed. (kidding)

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by Carlos S. 1+ years ago

My favorite is the 3rd and 1st!!!

Reply to Carlos S.'s comment
+3 thumb down thumb up
by Rachel K. 1+ years ago

he got burned!

Reply to Rachel K.'s comment
+3 thumb down thumb up
by j r. 1+ years ago

she fxcking roasted the guy in the last one!

Reply to j r.'s comment
+3 thumb down thumb up
by b o. 1+ years ago

last 1 is classic

Reply to b o.'s comment
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by sam W. 1+ years ago

3# is from Scrubs.

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[below viewing threshold, show comment] -9 thumb down thumb up
by Naveed S. 1+ years ago
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[below viewing threshold, show comment] -9 thumb down thumb up
by Naveed S. 1+ years ago

Show 1 replies to this comment

+1 thumb down thumb up
by John M. 1+ years ago

the last one was hilarious

Reply to John M.'s comment
+4 thumb down thumb up
by daniel d. 1+ years ago

the first ones were fairly good, but the last one was amazingly funny

Reply to daniel d.'s comment
+2 thumb down thumb up
by Antonio B. 1+ years ago

That last one was funny to me lol lmfao

Show 1 replies to this comment

+6 thumb down thumb up
by Vince V. 1+ years ago

whoah that last one was the funniest thing ive heard/read all day, lmao

Reply to Vince V.'s comment
+5 thumb down thumb up
by Shelly X. 1+ years ago

tehe

Reply to Shelly X.'s comment
[below viewing threshold, show comment] -15 thumb down thumb up
by mikayla j. 1+ years ago

uh kinda funny but not really.....

Show 1 replies to this comment

[below viewing threshold, show comment] -16 thumb down thumb up
by cherry m. 1+ years ago

that is so not funny...

Show 1 replies to this comment

CEKPF_6 Smartass Answers

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