Saying The Right Thing

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Jack wakes up with a huge hangover after attending his company's Christmas Party. Jack is not normally a drinker, but the drinks didn't taste like alcohol at all. He didn't even remember how he got home from the party. As bad as he was feeling, he wondered if he did something wrong.

Jack had to force himself to open his eyes and the first thing he sees is a couple of aspirins next to a glass of water on the side table. And, next to them, a single red rose! Jack sits up and sees his clothing in front of him, all clean and pressed. He looks around the room and sees that it is in perfect order, spotlessly clean. So is the rest of the house. He takes the aspirins, cringes when he sees a huge black eye staring back at him in the bathroom mirror. Then he notices a note hanging on the corner of the mirror written in red with little hearts on it and a kiss mark from his wife in Lipstick:

"Honey, breakfast is on the stove, I left early to get groceries to make you your favorite dinner tonight. I love you, darling! Love, Jillian"

He stumbles to the kitchen and sure enough, there is hot breakfast, steaming hot coffee and the morning newspaper. His son is also at the table, eating. Jack asks, "Son... What happened last night?"

"Well, you came home after 3 A.M., drunk and out of your mind. You fell over the coffee table and broke it, and then you puked in the hallway, and got that black eye when you ran into the door.

Confused, he asked his son, "So, why is everything in such perfect order and so clean? I have a rose, and breakfast is on the table waiting for me??"

His son replies, "Oh THAT! Mom dragged you to the bedroom, and when she tried to take your pants off, you screamed, "Leave me alone, I'm married!!"

Broken Coffee Table: $239.99. Hot Breakfast: $4.20. Two Aspirins: $.38. Saying the right thing, at the right time. . . PRICELESS!!!

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smiley 10 PG

submitted: 1+ years ago

viewed: 397,867 times

categories: men, women, relationships

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showing 1 - 29 of 29 discussions       sort by: newest

+1 thumb down thumb up
by Nicolas M. 1+ years ago

Awwwww! cute! <3

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by cathy c. 1+ years ago
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by cathy c. 1+ years ago
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by cathy c. 1+ years ago
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by Mike F. 1+ years ago

STUPID/Keep your 'Day JOB"!!!!!!!!!!

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+2 thumb down thumb up
by lorne r. 1+ years ago

lucky

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+3 thumb down thumb up
by Silver I. 1+ years ago

That was really Cute. Its funny as well

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+2 thumb down thumb up
by Kristen C. 1+ years ago

awwwwwwwwwwwww

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+4 thumb down thumb up
by Tahlullah R. 1+ years ago

Why does the son know what happens when his dad's pants come off??

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+1 thumb down thumb up
by Spencer M. 1+ years ago

with everything there is MasterCard

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+2 thumb down thumb up
by Trisha B. 1+ years ago

So funny 10

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+2 thumb down thumb up
by Sashikala N. 1+ years ago

Priceless!!!!

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[below viewing threshold, show comment] -6 thumb down thumb up
by Shane P. 1+ years ago

almost as funny as the shirt I seen on ShirtBuys.com

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+2 thumb down thumb up
by Antonio A. 1+ years ago

nice

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+2 thumb down thumb up
by Epic F. 1+ years ago

love it!

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[below viewing threshold, show comment] -20 thumb down thumb up
by maria d. 1+ years ago

WIN FREE TALK TIME ON YOUR MOBILE IN EVERY 10 MINUTES SO WHY YOU ARE WAITING JUST GO FOR IT… http://www.winwithsearch.com/landingpage.aspx?um=02

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[below viewing threshold, show comment] -3 thumb down thumb up
by Jasmine S. 1+ years ago

he was trained well

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+2 thumb down thumb up
by Brandon S. 1+ years ago

That is one LUCKY dude. lol Great Joke.

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by Destiny G. 1+ years ago

Cute lol

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+1 thumb down thumb up
by Haley F. 1+ years ago

that took me a sec to understand, but funny!

Reply to Haley F.'s comment
+4 thumb down thumb up
by Eric M. 1+ years ago

In a funny way, this is kind of touching.

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+2 thumb down thumb up
by Paul Z. 1+ years ago

genius

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by David G. 1+ years ago

This is the funniest joke i've ever yet!!!!!!!!!!!!!! HAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Reply to David G.'s comment
+4 thumb down thumb up
by jeff o. 1+ years ago

i love this.

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+5 thumb down thumb up
by Tina S. 1+ years ago

THAT SOUNDS LIKE MY MAN LOL

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+2 thumb down thumb up
by Shelly X. 1+ years ago

mmmm nice

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[below viewing threshold, show comment] -6 thumb down thumb up
by mikayla j. 1+ years ago

cool!!!!!!! not that funny but still cool

Reply to mikayla j.'s comment
+5 thumb down thumb up
by Siaosi L. 1+ years ago

lmao that was unexpected! Nice!

Reply to Siaosi L.'s comment
+4 thumb down thumb up
by Brittany P. 1+ years ago

nice!!!!!!!!

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CED4W_Saying The Right Thing

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