Leon's Death

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There was once a grown man by the name of Leon. He was very stupid and did not like to talk. He almost never understood what anybody said, and had a tendancy to repeat funny things that people said. One day, he was walking down the street to the grocery store and watched two kids fooling around, pretending to be gangsters. One child said, "Hey man, what'chyou doin'?". They laughed and Leon went to the grocery store, which took quite a while because Leon did not understand what "paper or plastic" meant. When he got back, he watched the kids have a spitting contest. He sat and ate his bananas and watched the children spit incredible distances. When he had finished, he threw the banana peels away, but he kept one banana in his coat pocket. He went back to the bench and one child said, "I'm a straight-up gangsta, yo!" to which the other child responded, "I'll get 13 (feet)!". After the contest, the two kids began playing rock, paper, scissors. The short one kept losing to the rock and the taller one said, "I love rock!" After getting bored with that game, the children began merrily picking their noses. The tall one was good at this, and he kept getting more and more boogers. The shorter one was jeleous and screamed, "Where is it?", refering to the boogers. The smug one who kept getting more replied, "It's up yours!" At this point, you must be bored and waiting for the punchline. Wait, it'll come. Leon was bored and it was night time, so he decided to head home, like the children did. As he was walking through Detroit, he accidentally bumped into a gang-member. "Hey man, what'chyou doin'?" yelled the gang member. Then, he flashed him his gun. Leon, being incredibly stupid, thought he should do the same and flashed them his banana, which, with a quick flourish, looked like a gun. Then, remembering the children, he said with a laugh, "I'm a straight-up gangsta, yo!" The gang burst out in laughter and the leader said, "Yeah, well let's have a contest of how many bloods (kills) you can get in one night." "I'll get 13!" screamed Leon, once again, remembering the children. "Ok, fine, what'll I give you if you win?" "I love rock! (drugs)" said Leon. "Ok, fine, 4 grams of rock it is." The night continued where Leon just stood there as the gang members sought out for innocent people to kill. Then, when the gang came back, the leader said, "We got 12, what about you?" Leon had no idea what he was talking about and did not say anything. "Where is it?" asked the gang, referring to the drugs. Remembering that was the exact phrase the short child said, he said the same thing that the taller one said when asked that question. "It's up yours!"

--Please rate, I think it deserves atleast a 3.


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smiley 3.3 PG13

submitted: 1+ years ago

viewed: 1,834 times

categories: bar, drinking





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