There was a woman who recently lost her husband. She decided to get a pet as a companion, so she wouldn't be so lonely. The woman finally narrowed down her choice to a talking parrot. The pet store owner warned her about the bird's potential to swear. "I'm not worried about that. I'll teach that little birdie to be good."
When the woman got home the bird's first word was, "Shit". "Now little birdie I'll give you two more warnings about swearing and then you're going in the freezer for 20 seconds if it doesn't stop."
A couple days later the bird said, "asshole." The woman gave him another warning. The bird was good for about a week and then said,"son of a bitch."
"That's it!" said the woman. She put the parrot in the freezer and timed it to exactly twenty seconds. When she took the bird out she said,"Well, did you you learn your lesson?"
"Yyyaaa," shivered the bird. "But, wwwwhhhat the fffuck did the turkey do?"