Restroom Poetry

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Restroom Poetry

The following are poems found inscribed in public restrooms:

Here I lie in stinky vapor, Because some bastard stole the paper, Shall I lie, or shall I linger, Or shall I be forced to use my finger.

Here I sit Broken hearted, Paid a dime And only farted

Here I sit What a caper I have to shit But I'm out of paper

You're lucky You had your chance I tried to fart, And shat my pants!

Some people come here to take a shit, I came here to leave one.

Some come here to sit and think, Some come here to shit and stink, But I come here to scratch my balls, And read the bullshit on the walls...

Here I sit, I'm at a loss trying to shit out taco sauce. When it comes, I hope and pray, that I don't blow my ass away.

(Written high up on the wall) If you can piss above this line, the Hillsboro Fire Department wants you.

(Seen above a urinal) Please do not throw cigarette butts in our urinal. We don't piss in your ashtrays!

(Scratched into the paint of the condom-dispensing machine) "Don't buy this gum, it tastes like rubber."

(Under a sign that said: "Employees Must Wash Hands") I waited and waited, but I finally washed them myself.

Thanks for reading my poetry! Please vote.

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smiley 8.4 PG13

submitted: 1+ years ago

viewed: 12,119 times

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showing 1 - 11 of 11 discussions       sort by: newest

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by Brenda W. 1+ years ago

I once read, "If you're reading this, you are shitting at an angle of 45 degrees." And I was!!!!

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by so k. 1+ years ago

conclusion: doing number 2 is more inspirational than number one

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by Kitsune U. 1+ years ago

Stephen King wrote a short story about a suicidal salesman who collected these.

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by Alyssa C. 1+ years ago

My favorite was "don't buy this gum, it tastes like rubber" !!!!!!1 :))))))))))))))))))))))))))))

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by Avery A. 1+ years ago

Heres my own: Here I sit, in fear and I wait, hoping that my poop don't hate, shall it push out with corn? Or shall it spray out with scorn? Shall it roll off my buns? Or will it show that I have the runs?

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by -1 -. 1+ years ago

funny

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by Alexandra C. 1+ years ago

hahaha really funny!

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by Jack A. 1+ years ago

Don't buy this gum, it tastes like rubber.

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by Jennifer M. 1+ years ago

HAHAHA!!!! THESE R GREAT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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by Roisin O. 1+ years ago

Hahaha!!! Good one!!

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by Julia Z. 1+ years ago

i loved it. it reminds me of public school bathrooms

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CCNWN_Restroom Poetry

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