Things I learned from South Park

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1. Pig and Elephant DNA just won’t splice

2. How to make Chef’s Chocolate Salty Balls

3. Spontaneous combustion is caused by holding in all your farts.

4. On planet Marklar, everyone and everything is referred to as Marklar.

5. Satan is Saddaam’s gay lover

6. The great plague was caused by people swearing too much

7. Despite all the wars, the leaders of all the world’s leaders and sea-man are all super best friends.

8. When Haman returns from the Ninth Tower of Disillusionment, and smites Moses and all his followers into pillars of dust that would cry for their petty lives but can't, having recently been turned into dust and all, you will see!

9. Zytar’s planet is dying. They had no choice but to find a new one. Manufacturing Smart Towels is their way to spy on humans to see how we live.

10. Jared has Aides

11. If you shove food up your ass, you’ll crap out your mouth

12. Earth is a galactic television show run by large green aliens with penises on their shoulders

13. You can cure SARS with Campbell's Chicken Noodle Soup, Dayquil, and Sprite.

14. There'z no Canada like French Canada, it'z za bezt Canada in ze land.Ze ozer Canada is hardly Canada. If you lived here for a day, you'd understand.

15. Paris Hilton can fit a pineapple in her vagina.

16. Mr. Slave can fit Paris Hilton in his ass.

17. The PSP was created by god to see which mortal could best defend heaven against Satan’s army.

18. Orca Whales are actually zypods from the moon. They are being held captive at sea world by evil communists from the horsehead nebula who want to kill all the zypods

19. Family Guy is written by Manatees.

20. There is a creature called ManBearPig waders the earth alone. I’m serial. ManBearPig doesn’t care who you are or what you’ve done. He simply wants to get you!! I’m super-serial.”


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smiley 3.7 PG13

submitted: 1+ years ago

viewed: 2,021 times

categories: celebrities, entertainment, people





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