One thing that has always bugged me, and I'm sure it does most of you, is to sit down at the dinner table only to be interrupted by a phone call from a telemarketer.

I decided, on one such occasion, to try to be as irritating as they were to me. The call was from AT&T and it went something like this:

Me: (swallowing) Hello

AT&T: Hello, this is AT&T...

Me: Is this AT&T?

AT&T: Yes, this is AT&T...

Me: This is AT&T?

AT&T: Yes This is AT&T...

Me: Is this AT&T?

AT&T: YES! This is AT&T, may I speak to Mr. Byron please?

Me: May I ask who is calling?

AT&T: This is AT&T.

Me: OK, hold on.

At this point I put the phone down for a solid 5 minutes thinking that, surely, this person would have hung up the phone. I ate my salad. Much to my surprise, when I picked up the receiver, they were still waiting.

Me: Hello?

AT&T: Is this Mr. Byron?

Me: May I ask who is calling please?

AT&T: Yes this is AT&T...

Me: Is this AT&T?

AT&T: Yes this is AT&T...

Me: This is AT&T?

AT&T: Yes, is this Mr. Byron?

Me: Yes, is this AT&T?

AT&T: Yes sir.

Me: The phone company?

AT&T: Yes sir.

Me: I thought you said this was AT&T.

AT&T: Yes sir, we are a phone company.

Me: I already have a phone.

AT&T: We aren't selling phones today Mr. Byron.

Me: Well whatever it is, I'm really not interested but thanks for calling.

When you are not interested in something, I don't think you can express yourself any plainer than by saying "I'm really not interested," but this lady was persistent.

AT&T: Mr. Byron, we would like to offer you 10 cents a minute, 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, 365 days a year. Now, I am sure she meant she was offering a "rate" of 10 cents a minute, but she at no time used the word "rate." I could clearly see that it was time to whip out the trusty old calculator and do a little ciphering.

Me: Now, that's 10 cents a minute 24 hours a day?

AT&T: (getting a little excited at this point by my interest) Yes sir, that's right! 24 hours a day!

Me: 7 days a week?

AT&T: That's right.

Me: 365 days a year?

AT&T: Yes sir.

Me: I am definitely interested in that! Wow!!! That's amazing!

AT&T: We think so!

Me: That's quite a sum of money!

AT&T: Yes sir, it's amazing how it adds up.

Me: OK, so will you send me checks weekly, monthly or just one big one at the end of the year for the full $52,560, and if you send an annual check, can I get a cash advance?

AT&T: Excuse me?

Me: You know, the 10 cents a minute.

AT&T: What are you talking about?

Me: You said you'd give me 10 cents a minute, 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, 365 days a year. That comes to $144 per day, $1,008 per week and $52,560 per year. I'm just interested in knowing how you will be making payment.

AT&T: Oh no, sir, I didn't mean we'd be paying you. You pay us 10 cents a minute.

Me: Wait a minute here!!! Didn't you say you'd give me 10 cents a minute? Are you sure this is AT&T?

AT&T: Well, yes this is AT&T sir but......

Me: But nothing, how do you figure that by saying that you'll give me 10 cents a minute that I'll give you 10 cents a minute? Is this some kind of subliminal telemarketing scheme? I've read about things like this in the Enquirer, you know. Don't use your alien brainwashing techniques on me.

AT&T: No sir, we are offering 10 cents a minute for.....

Me: THERE YOU GO AGAIN! Can I speak to a supervisor please!

AT&T: Sir, I don't think that is necessary.

Me: Sure! You say that now! What happens later?

AT&T: What?

Me: I insist on speaking to a supervisor!

AT&T: Yes Mr. Byron. Please hold.

So now AT&T has me on hold and my supper is getting cold. I begin to eat while I'm waiting for a supervisor. After a wait of a few minutes and while I have a mouth full of food:

Supervisor: Mr. Byron?

Me: Yeth?

Supervisor: I understand you are not quite understanding our 10 cents a minute program.

Me: Id thish Ath Teeth & Teeth?

Supervisor: Yes sir, it sure is.

I had to swallow before I choked on my food. It was all I could do to suppress my laughter and I had to be careful not to produce a snort.

Me: No, actually, I was just waiting for someone to get back to me so that I could sign up for the plan.

Supervisor: OK, no problem, I'll transfer you back to the person who was helping you.

Me: Thank you.

I was on hold once again and managed a few more mouthfuls. I needed to end this conversation. Suddenly, there was an aggravated but polite voice at the other end of the phone.

AT&T: Hello Mr. Byron, I understand that you are interested in signing up for our plan?

Me: Do you have that friends and family thing because you can never have enough friends and I'm an only child and I'd really like to have a little brother...

AT&T: (click)

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showing 1 - 22 of 22 discussions       sort by: newest

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by Claire K. 1+ years ago

HAHAHAHA hilarious! I'm so gonna do that thnx 4 the idea, Alex V!!!!!!!

Reply to Claire K.'s comment
+1 thumb down thumb up
by Nick S. 1+ years ago

BORING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Reply to Nick S.'s comment
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by Dalton E. 1+ years ago

Ath Teeth & Teeth. Couldn't stop laughing!!!!!! XDDDDDDDDDDD

Reply to Dalton E.'s comment
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by Olivia B. 1+ years ago

whenever a telemarketer calls i just say they have the wrong number

Reply to Olivia B.'s comment
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by Preston N. 1+ years ago

Absolutly hilarious!!!¡¡¡!!!!¡¡¡¡$

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by Dayci D. 1+ years ago

Hi xavier this is my favorite joke :) i love it :) it makes laugh :) and have good day :) lol :) haha :)

Reply to Dayci D.'s comment
[below viewing threshold, show comment] -1 thumb down thumb up
by b o. 1+ years ago

Lmbao "laughing My Beutiful Ass Off" This is funny!!!!!!!!

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by Yuki H. 1+ years ago

OMG I m going 2 do that when those damn telemarketers call ^_^ thnx for the idea!!!!!

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by Chester K. 1+ years ago

and my day was going horrible...just until i read this masterpiece! Alex V., you're a genius!

Reply to Chester K.'s comment
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by Giselle D. 1+ years ago

friends and family! i would most deffinatly like have more friends! and a sister! ROFL perhaps one of the funniest ive read on this site :)

Reply to Giselle D.'s comment
+1 thumb down thumb up
by Bethany S. 1+ years ago

Hilarious!! xDDD

Reply to Bethany S.'s comment
+1 thumb down thumb up
by Andy P. 1+ years ago

WOW! that was awesome!

Reply to Andy P.'s comment
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by Kristen C. 1+ years ago

freakin awesome!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! im goin to do that sometime

Reply to Kristen C.'s comment
+4 thumb down thumb up
by Dirson Eduardo J. 1+ years ago

Amazing, i laughed the whole joke, couldn't read it because i was laughing so much!! Thanks for the Joke.

Reply to Dirson Eduardo J.'s comment
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by Michael G. 1+ years ago

If this is real then I take my hat off to you! If however you are lying and this never really happened then, WHY NOT? If you can think it then you should do it!

Reply to Michael G.'s comment
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by Jon L. 1+ years ago

it was super funny when you asnswer the phone yeth

Reply to Jon L.'s comment
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by James P. 1+ years ago

LOL i laughed my @$$ off when he was eating and said is this ath teeth and teeth, this story is hilarious

Reply to James P.'s comment
+7 thumb down thumb up
by Emma G. 1+ years ago

brill!! a round of applause is deserved, alex!!! *clap clap clap ect.*

Reply to Emma G.'s comment
+4 thumb down thumb up
by Harmony H. 1+ years ago

Hilarious! lol!

Reply to Harmony H.'s comment
+5 thumb down thumb up
by ori2008 y. 1+ years ago

hahahahahaha hilarious!! i should do that once!

Reply to ori2008 y.'s comment
+5 thumb down thumb up
by Taylor L. 1+ years ago

Omg, that was hilarious. Almost wet my pants. :]

Reply to Taylor L.'s comment
+4 thumb down thumb up
by Patricia R. 1+ years ago

that was awesome!

Reply to Patricia R.'s comment
CCH5Z_AT & T

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