Yo Momma so ...

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YO MOMMA SO BALD... ...You can see what’s on her mind ...That she took a shower and got brainwashed

YO MOMMA SO TALL... ...She tripped over a rock and hit her head on the moon ...She did a back-flip and kicked Jesus in the mouth

YO MOMMA HOUSE SO DIRTY... ...Roaches ride around on dune buggies! ...She has to wipe her feet before she goes outside

YO MOMMA SO OLD... ...I told her to act her own age, and the bitch died ...She has Jesus' beeper number! ...That when God said let there be light, she hit the switch ...That when she was in school there was no history class ...She’s in Jesus’ year book! ...She knew burger while was still a king ...She was a waitress at the last supper ...Her birth certificate is in roman numerals ...She sat behind Jesus in the third grade

YO MOMMA SO DIRTY...

...She has to creep up on bathwater ...She sweats Crisco

YO MOMMA HEAD SO SMALL...

...She uses a tea-bag as a pillow ...That she got her ear pierced and died

YO MOMMA SO STUPID...

...She got locked in a grocery store and starved! ...That she tried to put M&M’s in alphabetical order! ...She sold her car for gasoline money! ...She bought a solar-powered flashlight! ...She took a ruler to bed to see how long she slept ...She took the Pepsi challenge and chose Jif ...When you stand next to her you hear the ocean! ...That she thought Boyz II Men was a day care centre

YO MOMMA SO SKINNY...

...She hula hoops with a cheerio ...She turned sideways and disappeared

YO MOMMA SO POOR... ...When I saw her kicking a can down the street, I asked her what she was doing, she said, ‘Moving.’ ...She can’t afford to pay attention! ...When I ring the doorbell I hear the toilet flush! ...Your family ate cereal with a fork to save milk

YO MOMMA SO SHORT...

...She poses for trophies! ...You can see her feet on her driver’s license

YO MOMMA SO HAIRY...

...You almost died of rug burn at birth! ...She’s got afros on her nipples!

YO MOMMA SO NASTY...

...She brings crabs to the beach ...She made right guard turn left ...That her shit is glad to escape ...I called her for phone sex and she gave me an ear infection

YO MOMMA SO FAT...

...Her nickname is DAMN! ...She went to the movies and sat next to everyone ...You have to roll over twice to get off her ...When she has sex, she has to give directions! ...When she wears a yellow raincoat, people say, ‘Taxi.’ ...She had to go to sea world to get baptized ...She has to iron her pants on the driveway ...She put on her lipstick with a paint-roller ...She has to pull down her pants to get into her pockets ...When she steps on a scale it reads, ONE AT A TIME PLEASE ...She fell in love and broke it ...When she gets on a scale it says to be continued ...NASA has to orbit a satellite around her ...Even Bill Gates couldn’t pay for her liposuction ...She wakes up in sections! ...When she goes to an amusement park, people try to ride her! ...She was mistaken for God’s bowling ball! ...When she jumps in the air she gets stuck!!! ...She’s got more chins than a Hong Kong phone book! ...Every time she walks in high heels, she strikes oil! ...She sat on the beach and Greenpeace threw her in! ...Even her clothes have stretch marks! ...She broke her leg, and gravy poured out! ...They have to grease the bath tub to get her out! ...When she backs up she beeps ...When she fell over she rocked herself to sleep trying to get up again ...That when I tried to drive around her I ran out of gas! ...When she dances at a concert the whole band skips ...She left the house in high heels and when she came back she had on flip flops ...She sets off car alarms when she runs ...She uses trees to pick her teeth ...The only pictures you have of her are satellite pictures ...She sat on a rainbow and made skittles ...She uses a mattress for a tampon ...That when she was born, she gave the hospital stretch marks ...The National Weather Agency has to assign names to her farts!!!

YO MOMMA SO UGLY...

...She looked out the window and got arrested for mooning ...They filmed “Gorillas in the mist” in her shower ...When she walks into a bank, they turn off the surveillance cameras ...Her mom had to be drunk to breast feed her ...She made an onion cry ...She scares roaches away ...She tried to take a bath and the water jumped out! ...Even rice krispies won’t talk to her! ...She turned Medusa to stone! ...That your father takes her to work with him so that he doesn’t have to kiss her goodbye

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smiley 4.4 PG13

submitted: 1+ years ago

viewed: 1,510 times

categories: insults yo mama

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