There was a middle aged lady. She noticed that she was starting to get a few wrinkles so she decided to go to a plastic surgeon to get rid of them.
At the plastic surgery office the doctor said "Well you have plenty of hair so I'm going to place a dial here in the back of your head and every time you see some loose skin, just twist the dial a little and you will look great."
She got home and twisted it until she looked 20 years younger. The next morning she looked in the mirror and saw some loose skin so she twisted it a little and looked great. She did this for many days until one day she got these huge bags under her eyes and the dial wouldn't twist anymore.
She went back to the plastic surgeon and told him about the bags and he asked her "How often did you turn the dial?" and she said "Well, everyday..." and he goes "Well ma'am those arent bags under your eyes those are your breasts." and she goes "Well, that explains the goatee."
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