I have recently discovered that Barney the purple dinosaur is the pied piper leading our children into the clutches of eternal damnation. Who else but such a hayness character could be causing drug wars, school violence, and such?! So instead of "I love you" make your children sing this (Not only will it save them, but teach them some useful adult information.)
(To the tune of "I love You")...
I hate you, you hate me lets join up and kill Barney With a forty-four shot gun hit him at the door no more purple dinosaur!