15. Genetational pinocchiotomy.
14. Doubling the interest rate on your mutual fun.
13. Peter padding.
12. Plumping the ball park frank.
11. Putting the archbishop on the rack.
10. Puffin' the magic dragon.
9. Supersizing Big Mac.
8. Adding a wing to the sexual addiction clinic.
7. Putting the munchkin on stilts.
6. Trading in the escort for a stretch limo.
5. Getting a Magic Johnson.
4. Preparing to boldly go where no manhood has gone before.
3. Turning crouching tiger into hidden dragon.
2. Upgrading passenger Johnson to first class.
1. Taking the train from Vienna to Frankfurt.