A lady is driving in her car. When she looks at the rearview mirror, she sees a martian sitting in the backseat. Terrified, she looses control of the car, crashes against a tree, and becomes unconscious.
When she wakes up, the martian is rubbing her breasts.
The martian says, "Do not be alarmed. I come in peace. I have stitched the cut between your legs and I am now trying to lower these engorged bruises."