LOG ON: Making a wood stove hot.
LOG OFF: Too much wood on fire.
MONITOR: Keep'n an eye on the wood stove.
DOWNLOAD: Gitten the farwood off'n the truck.
MEGA HERTZ: When yer not keerfull gitten the farwood.
FLOPPY DISK: Whatcha git from tryin ta tote too much farwood.
RAM: That thar thing what splits the farwood.
HARD DRIVE: Gitten home in the winter time.
WINDOWS: Whut to shut when it cold outside.
SCREEN: Whut to shut when its black fly season.
BYTE: Whut dem dang flys do.
CHIP: Munchies fer the TV.
MICRO CHIP: Whuts in the bottom of the munchie bag.
MODEM: Whatcha do in the hay fields.
DOT MATRIX: Ole Dan Matrix's wife.
LAP TOP: Whar the kitty sleeps.
KEYBOARD: Whar you hang dem dang truck keys.
SOFTWARE: Dem dang plastic forks and knives.
MOUSE: What eats the grain in the barn.
MOUSE PAD: That's hippie talk fer whar the mouse lives.
MAINFRAME: Holds up the barn roof.
PORT: Fancy flatlander wine.
ENTER: Northerner talk fer "C'Mon in y'all."
CLICK: Whut ya hear when ya cock yer gun.
DOUBLE CLICK: When you cock the double barrel.
REBOOT: Whut ya hafta do right before bedtime, when ya hafta go to the outhouse.