* Kitchen closed - this chick has had it!
* Martha Stewart doesn't live here!!
* I'm creative; you can't expect me to be neat, too!
* Ring Bell for Maid Service. If no answer, do it yourself!
* You may touch the dust in this house, but please don't write in it!
* If you write in the dust, please don't date it!
* I would cook dinner, but I can't find the can opener!
* I came, I saw, I decided to order take out.
* If you don't like my standards of cooking, lower your standards.
* I clean house every other day. Today is the other day!
* A messy kitchen is a happy kitchen, and this kitchen is delirious.
* A balanced diet is a cookie in each hand.
* Help keep the kitchen clean - eat out.
* Countless number of people have eaten in this kitchen and gone on to lead normal lives.
* My house was clean last week, too bad you missed it!
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