Things You'll Never Hear a Southerner Say

mark as unread

34 Things You'll Absolutely Never Hear a Southerner Say

1. We don't keep firearms in this house.

2. Has anybody seen the sideburns trimmer?

3. You can't feed that to the dog.

4. I thought Graceland was tacky.

5. No kids in the back of the pick-up; it's not safe.

6. Wrasslin's fake.

7. Honey, did you mail that donation to Greenpeace?

8. We're vegetarians.

9. Lee, do you think my hair is too big?

10. I'll have grapefruit instead of biscuits and gravy.

11. Honey, these bonsai trees need watering?

12. Who's Richard Petty?

13. Give me the small bag of pork rinds.

14. Deer heads detract from the decor.

15. Spittin' is such a nasty habit.

16. I just couldn't find a thing at Walmart today.

17. Trim the fat off that steak.

18. Cappuccino tastes better than espresso.

19. The tires on that truck are too big.

20. I'll have the arugula and radicchio salad.

21. I've got it all on a floppy disk.

22. Unsweetened tea tastes better.

23. Would you like your fish poached or broiled?

24. My fiancee, Paula Jo, is registered at Tiffany's.

25. I've got two cases of Zima for the Super Bowl.

26. Little Debbie snack cakes have too many fat grams.

27. Checkmate.

28. She's too old to be wearing that bikini.

29. Does the salad bar have bean sprouts?

30. Hey, here's an episode of "Hee Haw" that we haven't seen.

31. I don't have a favorite college team.

32. I believe you cooked those green beans too long.

33. Those shorts ought to be a little longer, Darla.

34. Elvis who?


How funny is this joke, video, picture?

Submitted By


smiley 6.4 PG

submitted: 1+ years ago

viewed: 7,389 times

categories: ethnic, race, international





Save to List


Personal Lists

Create New Personal List

List Name:

Allow Others to View/Subscribe:

save cancel


Community Lists

Create New Community List

List Name:

save cancel



User Comments Add Comment

showing 0 - 0 of 0 discussions       sort by: newest

C3MN_Things You'll Never Hear a Southerner Say

Advertise | About Us | Terms of Use | Privacy Policy | Copyright Agent | Parents' Guide | Contact