Who Died the Worst Death?

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Three men stand before St. Peter awaiting admission into Heaven. However, St. Peter has been informed that Heaven will only admit 33% of applicants today. The admissions standard: Who died the worst death? So, St. Peter takes each of the three men aside in turn and asks them about how they died.

First man: "I'd been suspecting for a long time that my wife was cheating on me. I decided to come home early from work one afternoon and check to see if I could catch her in the act. When I got back to my apartment, I heard the water running. My wife was in the shower. I looked everywhere for the guy, but couldn't find anyone or any trace that he had been there. The last place I looked was out on the balcony.

I found the bastard hanging from the edge, trying to get back in! So I started jumping up and down on his hands, and he yelled, but he didn't fall. So I ran inside and got a hammer, and crushed his fingers with it until he fell twenty-five floors screaming in agony. But the fall didn't kill the asshole. He landed in some bushes! So I dragged the refirgerator from the kitchen (it weighed about a ton), pulled it to the balcony, and hurled it over the edge. It landed right on the guy and killed him. But then I felt so horrible about what I had done, I went back into the bedroom and shot myself."

St. Peter nodded slowly as the man recounted the story. Then, telling the first man to wait, he took the second aside.

Second man: "I lived on the twenty-seventh floor of this apartment building. I had just purchased this book on morning exercises and was practicing them on my balcony, enjoying the sunshine, when I lost my balance and fell off the edge. Luckily, I only fell about two floors before grabbing another balcony and holding on for dear life. I was trying to pull myself up when this guy came running onto what must have been his balcony and started jumping up and down on my hands. I screamed in pain, but he seemed really irate. When he finally stopped, I tried to pull myself up again, but he came out with a hammer and smashed my fingers to a pulp! I fell, and I thought I was dead, but I landed in some bushes. I couldn't believe my second stroke of luck, but it didn't last. The last thing I saw was this enormous refrigerator falling from the building down on top of me and crushing me."

St. Peter comforted the man, who seemed to have several broken bones. Then he told him to wait, and turned to the third man.

Third man: "Picture this. You're hiding, naked, in a refrigerator..."

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submitted: 1+ years ago

viewed: 1,208,611 times

categories: men, women, relationships

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showing 1 - 13 of 13 discussions       sort by: newest

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by john h. 1+ years ago

nice...

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+1 thumb down thumb up
by Michael J. 1+ years ago

I am NOT kidding! but its the best joke ever ive heard! no really! i'm gonna tell it to my friends and their going to laff like mad! its really clever too well done

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by Alyanna G. 1+ years ago

i heard that before but its still funny

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by Cynthia S. 1+ years ago

That was pretty cool... Awesomely funny

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by Jackie O. 1+ years ago

Ha ha ha. So true.

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by Austin J. 1+ years ago

Haha I love it!

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by Betachief117 .. 1+ years ago

Who can lift a refrigerator over a balcony?

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+3 thumb down thumb up
by Emily H. 1+ years ago

the third guy was the guy the wife was cheating on him with and he was hiding from the husband in the fridge, naked

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by Abigail S. 1+ years ago

Yor thrying to say that he knew the man was in the fridge?He didn't,he knew the man was on his balcony,so he threw the fridge over the edge to crush him.

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by Amanda S. 1+ years ago

That was hella funny,, but it should have had ending telling what guy won..

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by alexis p. 1+ years ago

funny :D wait when the guys says the refrigoator weighed a ton, there was a dude in right? so was he calling that dude fat?

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by Em i. 1+ years ago

I dont get it lol x

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+4 thumb down thumb up
by Vince V. 1+ years ago

hahahahahahahaha thats so @#$%&# up! lmfao

Reply to Vince V.'s comment
C2KK_Who Died the Worst Death?

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