Walking home with a hangover one Sunday morning, a man discovered he'd lost his hat. He decided the easiest way to replace it was to go to church and steal one from the cloakroom.
Once inside, he heard a sermon on the Ten Commandments. After the sermon, he said to the minister, "I want you to know that you saved me from crime. I came here to steal a hat, but after hearing you, I decided not to."
"Wonderful," said the minister. "What did I say that changed your mind?"
"Well," said the man, "when you got to the part about committing adultery, I remembered where I left my hat."