Bathroom rhymes and graffiti (Part 6)

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-= bathroom rhymes and graffiti =-= 110 =--------------------------------------

UT Campus Austin, TX:

Urine the bathroom. Urine trouble. Look what a mess urine.

-= bathroom rhymes and graffiti =-= 111 =--------------------------------------

Seen in a local bar, recently:

For a good time, call ###-#### and ask for Mary. For a BAD time, tell Mary where you got this number.

-= bathroom rhymes and graffiti =-= 112 =--------------------------------------

How about this little ditty discovered in a public toilet in London?

As you sit to take a shit Rest a while and think a bit. The last time that I beat my meat, Was on this very toilet seat.

-= bathroom rhymes and graffiti =-= 113 =--------------------------------------

Written above a urinal:

Stand close. It's shorter than you think.

-= bathroom rhymes and graffiti =-= 114 =--------------------------------------

As a boy, my Dad used to fish off the end of a pier in the San Fransisco Bay. There was an old-style outhouse (no longer there) on the pier, put there by the owner. Apparently the owner got tired of people making a mess of his outhouse, so he wrote the following on the wall inside:

If you shit upon the floor, I will lock the shithouse door.

- Owner

A person who apparently had frequent need to visit the outhouse responded below the owner's message with:

If the shithouse door you lock, I'll throw your shithouse off the dock.

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The mens' restroom at Northern Telecom's Atlanta location (since closed down :-( ) had blackboards on the walls of the stalls with chalk for writing graffiti(true). People ignored the chalk and wrote on the blackboards with pen.

-= bathroom rhymes and graffiti =-= 116 =--------------------------------------

In University of Washington's Physics Hall, circa 1984, below toilet seat cover dispenser:

Walter Mondale's election hats

-= bathroom rhymes and graffiti =-= 117 =--------------------------------------

In the men's room at a Denny's restaurant:

It takes the human body about 24 hours to turn good food into shit. It only takes Denny's 10 minutes.

-= bathroom rhymes and graffiti =-= 118 =--------------------------------------

In case of nuclear war, hide in the urinal. Nobody ever hits 'em anyway.

-= bathroom rhymes and graffiti =-= 119 =--------------------------------------

Sign over urinal in mens room in Cambridge, Mass. bar near Harvard:

We don't sell our beer, we just rent it.

-= bathroom rhymes and graffiti =-= 120 =--------------------------------------

In a truck stop somewhere in Oklahoma:

Captain's Log: Me & Spock beamed down to shit.

-= bathroom rhymes and graffiti =-= 121 =--------------------------------------

Written over faded instructions on electric hand dryer:

Push button Rub hands together vigorously under air stream Wipe hands on pants

-= bathroom rhymes and graffiti =-= 122 =--------------------------------------

Here I sit to shit again. But instead of landing in the bowl, it landed on my pen.

-= bathroom rhymes and graffiti =-= 123 =--------------------------------------

Sign seen at a restaurant:

The hands that clean these toilets also make your food...please aim properly.

-= bathroom rhymes and graffiti =-= 124 =--------------------------------------

They paint these walls to cover my pen, but the shithouse poet has struck again.

-= bathroom rhymes and graffiti =-= 125 =--------------------------------------

The angle of the dangle is in direct proportion to the heat of the meat and the mass of the ass.

-= bathroom rhymes and graffiti =-= 126 =--------------------------------------

Here I sit, I'm at a loss trying to shit out taco sauce. When it comes, I hope and pray, I don't blow my ass away.

-= bathroom rhymes and graffiti =-= 127 =--------------------------------------

(written under a picture of crudely drawn flower)

Hi. I'm Johnny. I am five years old. I couldn't think of anything dirty to say, so I drew this fucking flower.

-= bathroom rhymes and graffiti =-= 128 =--------------------------------------

Here's one seen above a urinal:

look up [a little higher on the wall]

look up [even higher on the wall]

keep looking up [on the ceiling]

Quick! Look down! You're pissing on your shoes!

-= bathroom rhymes and graffiti =-= 129 =--------------------------------------

(Hostel, West Coast, South Island, New Zealand.)

There's nothing more underrated than a good shit, and nothing more overrated than a bad fuck.

-= bathroom rhymes and graffiti =-= 130 =--------------------------------------

Three different autors contributed to this one:

First pen: "Jesus is the answer" Second pen: "What is the question" Third pen : "Who was Felipe Alou's younger brother"

(The early-70's New York Yankees lineup featured three Alou brothers: Matty, Felipe, and Jesus. I still see this 20+ years later, even here in Red Sox territory.)

-= bathroom rhymes and graffiti =-= 131 =--------------------------------------

Seen somewhere in ladies room in Freiburg/Germany:

Arrow pointing to the bottom of the door and "Exit for Limbo Dancers".

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I saw the following exchange in the men's room at Computervision in the early 80's:

1: 2: What language is this, Esperanto? 3: Ne, tiu lingvo ne estas Esperanto - estas Morrison. 4: I saw Morris on TV in the cat food commercial!

-= bathroom rhymes and graffiti =-= 133 =--------------------------------------

Seen in front of the urinals at a college in Montreal:

You're holding your future in your hands!

Someone had added:

And it doesn't look too promising!

-= bathroom rhymes and graffiti =-= 134 =--------------------------------------

One of the funniest I've seen was also the simplest:

Fart loud if you love Jesus!


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smiley 7.4 PG13

submitted: 1+ years ago

viewed: 11,566 times

categories: word fun (puns, riddles)





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showing 1 - 1 of 1 discussions       sort by: newest

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by so k. 1+ years ago

public toilets are very inspirational

Reply to so k.'s comment
C15GG_Bathroom rhymes and graffiti (Part 6)

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